I am not an intellectual. An intellectual is someone who looks at a sausage and thinks of Picasso, whereas I just say 'pass the mustard'.
I might be old, but I'm still desirable.
I don't really know what Americans are like. I've no idea. I know a few things about them. In my imagination, they have warm peachy hearts, whereas the English have horrible spiteful withered hearts - success in England inspires envy - in America, it inspires hope.
It's really interesting because 50 years ago, if you didn't wear a hat everyone looked at you. It just proves that everything is fashion.
My only criticism about Quentin Crisp is that the subversive must be ready to subvert themselves. I may dress for myself, but I undress for everybody else, whereas he never did that - he was never prepared to drop a bomb on everything he did.
I don't think I'm known for my gifts - I'm known for my gall. I don't want to be just a famous person - I'm too old.
Everyone says Oscar Wilde was a dandy, but he wasn't, he was an aesthete. He took pleasure in food and stuff like that. Dandyism is much more austere-much more Calvinistic, more neurotic - it oscillates between narcissism and neurosis.
If I hear that people are litigious, I immediately dismiss them.
My one concession to American sensibilities was to remove my nail polish.
The function of music is to release us from the boredom of existence.
