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Actually we did not have the feelings we said we had until we spoke them--at least I didn't; to phrase them was to invent them and own them.

Philip Roth
Feelings, Phrases, Spokes
Philip Roth (1989). “Goodbye, Columbus”, p.33, Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
Actually we did not have the feelings we said we had until we spoke them--at least I didn't; to phrase them was to invent them and own them.