Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering.
Live one day at a time. Keep your attention in present time. Have no expectations. Make no judgements. And give up the need to know why things happen as they do. Give it up!
Act on your inner guidance, and give up your need for 'proof' that your inner guidance is authentic. The more you ask for proof, the less likely you are to receive any.
Have no judgments about your life, no expectations, and give up the need to know what happens tomorrow.
I cannot take you out and say you are separate from the whole. If someone says to me, "Well, how do I find my life purpose?" I first say, "You've never lost your life purpose." Number two, I say, "Have no judgments about your life. No expectations. Give up the need to know what happens tomorrow. Just be fully present and appreciate all that is in your life right now."