For myself, losing is not coming second. It's getting out of the water knowing you could have done better. For myself, I have won every race I've been in
I am not going to allow myself not to perform well just because I don't feel well. I am bulletproof to the extent that a lot of things can be thrown at me, but it's about how much I am prepared to let them affect me
When I go out and race, I'm not trying to beat opponents, I'm trying to beat what I have done ... to beat myself, basically. People find that hard to believe because we've had such a bias to always strive to win things. If you win something and you haven't put everything into it, you haven't actually achieved anything at all. When you've had to work hard for something and you've got the best you can out of yourself on that given day, that's where you get satisfaction from.
There is water in every lane, so it is OK.
I think it's better to attempt something and fail than it is to not even attempt it, so I'm glad that I've been prepared to put myself on the line there.
I swam the race like I trained to swim it. It is not mathematical. I just let my body do it. It is a lot easier if you let your body do what it is trained for.
This is why relays are so important, because you can find more in yourself for someone else, than what you can ever find for yourself.
Remember to do the things you enjoy away from swimming, regularly.
Sometimes we question things that we have done in our lives but how many times do we question what we haven't done in someone else's?
The only thing is I am a little bit ashamed of is I didn't come out earlier, that I didn't have the strength to do it, the courage to break that lie. But everyone goes on their own path to do this, and I don't want the struggle to be so hard for other people.
I'll go for broke. Swim faster. It's not going to be easy - this whole thing was never going to be easy.
I've missed out on a huge goal but the desire is still there.
I've enjoyed training again, I've enjoyed pushing myself in the pool and I'll keep on swimming until I feel I cannot get any more out of myself.
I thought I could, and thought I would, swim a lot quicker - much quicker.
Part of me didn't know if Australia wanted its champion to be gay.
People ask me 'what was going through your mind in the race?' and I don't know. I try and ...let my body do what it knows
This Is Me”: ”For the record, I am not gay and all my sexual experiences have been straight. I'm attracted to women, I love children and aspire to have a family one day … I know what it's like to grow up and be told what your sexuality is, then realising that it's not the full reality. I was accused of being gay before I knew who I was.
Compared to how I have raced before and how I have competed, the success that I have had, this does look like doom compared to it.
Im pleased to say that in telling them, and especially my parents, they told me that they love me and they support me. And for young people out there, know that thats usually what the answer is.
I think now I'll probably take a few days off and enjoy the competition and then sit down with a few people and work out what is next, work out what the next preparation will be and what competition will be next.
