I'm just trying to illustrate that it's okay to be different - not that it's good, not that it's bad, but that it's all right. I'm trying to tell kids to have a good time and to encourage them to be creative and to question things.
People read so much into what I do. It's fascinating to me because some of it's probably there, but I haven't thought of it.
I enjoy getting to be arty and quirky and weird and all the things that I don't have that much choice with. You just sort of use what you got.
I know you are, but what am I?
There's a lotta things about me you don't know anything about, Dottie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand.
I've always felt like a kid, and I still feel like a kid, and I've never had any problem tapping into my childhood, and my kid side. And I think that's a very universal thing, I don't think it's unique to me at all. People I've talked to in their 60s, 70s, 80s, and 90s have all told me "You know, I still feel 20." So I don't expect that I'm going to be any different.
I wouldn't sell my bike for all the money in the world. Not for a hundred million, trillion, billion dollars!
I've always felt like a kid, and I still feel like a kid, and I've never had any problem tapping into my childhood, and my kid side.
I think my entire career path was determined for me when I was 6 years old, watching reruns of 'I Love Lucy' on TV and thinking about making people laugh.
I'm fortunately not in a situation where someone owns me.
I'm right-handed, and the police report said I was jerking off with my left hand. That would have been the end of the case right there, proof it couldn't have been me.
It's a lot easier to say you're a comic than a performance artist.
I've been super lucky in that I've either been in or helped create situations where I do what I want. I'm super lucky. I get to do what I want and create art and make people laugh, and it's really fun.
The public may think I'm weird. They may think I'm crazy or anything that anyone wants to think about me. That's all fine. As long as one of the things you're not thinking about me is that I'm a pedophile. Because that's not true.
I'm the person with the final say on everything. I really love being in that position.
I was looking for a last name that was a first name. Growing up, I knew a kid who was the most obnoxious kid I ever knew, and his last name was Herman.
I call it... the hot dog tree, because... it's a hot dog tree.
I don't think Bruce Willis can compete with me. I have a much better voice.
I would love to be in Kansas.
Why would I, in a million years, want to do anything even remotely having to do with child molestation on a children's show? See, I take having a kids' show real seriously. I think it's an enormous responsibility.
There were just things in Disney movies that probably were too scary for kids.
I take having a kids' show real seriously. I think it's an enormous responsibility.
I probably have become more infamous from two misdemeanors than probably anyone I could think of.
The public already knows about me more than I ever wanted it to know.
There were nude pictures... a lot of it is erotic or sexual. But I don't view my collection as dirty in any way. I view it as art.
