Penn Jillette Quotes

If you believe that there’s a heaven and hell and people could be going to hell—or not getting eternal life or whatever—and you think that, well, it’s not really worth telling them this because it would make it socially awkward. . . . How much do you have to hate somebody to not proselytize? How much do you have to hate somebody to believe that everlasting life is possible and not tell them that?

If every trace of any single religion were wiped out and nothing were passed on, it would never be created exactly that way again. There might be some other nonsense in its place, but not that exact nonsense. If all of science were wiped out, it would still be true and someone would find a way to figure it all out again.

If you've gotten yourself into a situation when Clay Aiken is going to talk about his feelings with you, it's time to kill yourself.

I do believe that a belief in God is crazy, but that doesn't mean that the people who believe in it are crazy. Those are two different things. Ideas can be stupid and crazy, and the people who hold those ideas are not necessarily stupid and crazy.

Only Atheists have morals, the religious have reward and punishment. That's not morality, that's sucking up.

Fear is the politicians dance partner.

People need to be fed, medicated, educated, clothed, and sheltered, and if we're compassionate we'll help them, but you get no moral credit for forcing other people to do what you think is right. There is great joy in helping people, but no joy in doing it at gunpoint.

God works in mysterious, inefficient, and breathtakingly cruel ways

Never ascribe to conspiracy that which can be attributed to ignorance.

If there's something you really want to believe, that's what you should question the most.

Much better than the feeling of having things is the feeling of having earned things.

Every time something really bad happens, people cry out for safety, and the government answers by taking rights away from good people

You get no moral credit for forcing other people to do what you think is right.

One of the strongest feelings you can get in life--one of the most rewarding feelings--is the feeling of an "Aha, I finally understand."

Religion cannot and should not be replaced by atheism. Religion needs to go away and not be replaced by anything. Atheism is not a religion. It's the absence of religion, and that's a wonderful thing.

I believe that the best way to become an atheist is to read the bible

Tolerance is you saying something crazy and me smiling and saying, 'That's nice.'

If the bible were published as fiction, no reviewer would give it a passing grade. There are some vivid scenes and quotable phrases but there's no plot, no structure, a tremendous amount of filler and the characters are painfully one dimensional. Whatever you do, don't read the bible for a moral code. It advocates prejudice, cruelty, superstition and murder. Read it because we need more atheists.

Atheism is the absence of religion. We don’t really need atheism. We just need to get rid of religion.

You don't have freedom unless you have the freedom to do stupid self-destructive things.

It's amazing to me how many people think that voting to have the government give poor people money is compassion. Helping poor and suffering people yourself is compassion. Voting for our government to use guns to give money to help poor and suffering people is immoral, self-righteous, bullying laziness.

In music, if you hit a wrong note, people forgive you. In magic when something goes wrong, the entire art is destroyed.

Believing there is no God gives me more room for belief in family, people, love, truth, beauty, sex, Jell-O, and all the other things I can prove and that make this life the best life I will ever have.

Believing there's no God means I can't really be forgiven except by kindness and faulty memories. That's good; it makes me want to be more thoughtful. I have to try to treat people right the first time around.

We are only here for a little while, and our bodies belong to ourselves and no one else.