Steve Coogan Quotes about Funny

I don't like big feet. It reminds me of gammon.

Actually the best thing I did was to get thrown out by my wife. She's living with a fitness instructor. He drinks that yellow stuff in tins. He's an idiot.

If it was just the potatoes that were affected, at the end of the day you will pay the price if you're a fussy eater.

I'm gonna hump ya. Like Deputy Dog... Would hump ya.

Got my fungal foot powder? Ah, it's a lifesaver, you know. I'd effectively be disabled if it weren't for these.

In my mind God made Adam and Eve, he didn't make Adam and Steve.

Guide dogs for the blind. It's cruel really, isn't it? Getting a dog to lead a man round all day. Not fair on either of them.

Sadly, I can't say the same for my Father, who is probably in a different place - Hell.

That was liquid football

A friend of mine once said he like his women like his parmesan: strong smelling and shaved. I don't agree with that, but I don't like hairy women.

It's arguably the best newspaper in the world.

All those people who go around saying Life begins at forty, they're notable by their absence. The nerve.

I woke with a start. At first I assumed I'd trumped myself awake again.

I'm 47, my girlfriend's 33; she's 14 years younger than me: Back of the net!

Two fat ladies, 88! Not that you'd find these ladies at a bingo hall, of course... they're altogether a higher class of fat lady.

Convoy? Michael, you're hanging around with a man who uses a collective term for a single vehicle.

There's never any graffiti in the hotel. Although in the Gents a couple of weeks ago I did see someone had drawn a lady's part. Quite detailed. The guy obviously had talent.

You really have got lots of issues! Yeah, of 'What Car Magazine'!