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I played no sports well. Because I was a boy in the United States Of America, I was forced into Little League and played horrible Little League baseball, and played football and basketball in school situations where I was forced to.

"Ira Glass on doing magic tricks, Brad Pitt, and Emerson, Lake & Palmer". Interview with Esther Zuckerman, www.avclub.com. August 2, 2016.
I played no sports well. Because I was a boy in the United States Of America, I was forced into Little League and played horrible Little League baseball, and played football and basketball in school situations where I