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We don't seek the painful experiences that hew our identities, but we seek our identities in the wake of painful experiences.

Andrew Solomon
Painful Experiences, Identity, Painful
"How Do Our Worst Moments Shape Us?". "TED Radio Hour" with Guy Raz, andrewsolomon.com. August 01, 2014.
We don't seek the painful experiences that hew our identities, but we seek our identities in the wake of painful experiences.