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The measure of self-assurance is how deeply and sincerely interested you are in others; the measure of insecurity is how much you try to impress them with you.

Mark Goulston
Self, Insecurity, Trying
Mark Goulston (2015). “Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone”, p.63, AMACOM Div American Mgmt Assn
The measure of self-assurance is how deeply and sincerely interested you are in others; the measure of insecurity is how much you try to impress them with you.