Denis Leary Quotes - Page 8

I studied acting in school and then of course couldn't get an acting job.

I'm gonna get one of those tracheotomies, so I can smoke two cigarettes at the same time! I'm gonna get nine tracheotomies, all around my neck, I'll be Tracheotomy Man! He can smoke a pack at a time, he's Tracheotomy Man!

When I become president, all you assholes that ride bikes in the city? Lock and load! You're going down!

I spent a long time working in the movies to figure out that kind of acting and also how to write and produce for the screen.

I really, really like 'Eastbound & Down.' It's one of the few things that makes me laugh.

I really want to do a western film. It's one of my favorite movie genres of all time.

I really like 'Batman.' Not the TV show, but the dark 'Batman.'

I obviously identify with the anti-authority figure. I've pretty much always had problems with authority, ever since I was a kid.

What's politically correct a lot of times is not funny.

My dad was very much a John Wayne kind of guy, but he was also a great guy, great sense of humor, a real dedicated dad. I don't think he ever missed a hockey game I was in.

When I'm on stage, that's me. It's blown up, but that's me.

You can't teach somebody how to be funny. You're either funny, or you ain't.

You try to - you want to fly on both sides of the political fence because that's where the - where the comedy is.

If the world somehow actually ends tomorrow, let all forget about the Mayans and just agree it`s the NHL`s fault

First of all, I have to have trucks because I live most of my time on a horse farm, so I've gotta have trucks. It's in the northeast; I've got to have pickup trucks to move snow, number one. Number two, just if I'm driving, I don't have to have an SUV, but I want a big car.

Good actors, especially when they know their character, will come in and either tell you in advance that they have an idea, or in the middle of the rehearsal or the scene they'll let it loose and you go, "Ah that's great."

Having dealt with a lot of real firefighters, I know there are a lot of guys who, for lack of a better term, become addicted to the grief because it has kept them connected to these guys that they felt responsible for having lost.

The best pitch I ever heard about cocaine was back in the early eighties when a street dealer followed me down the sidewalk going: I got some great blow man. I got the stuff that killed Belushi.

We drink and we die and continue to drink.

Loud, stupid and overeating will suffice as long as we also have the funny, the fierce and the intellectual

I went to school with Steven Wright who was the shyest guy I knew, and one day someone suddenly told me that he was in a club doing standup comedy. I went down to his club and he was great. Another friend of mine, who was pretty much a thief by trade, was hosting the show. So I thought if these guys can do it then so can I.

I'd love to play in a Red Sox game. It would be so awesome to actually walk out on the field and play, just for one inning. I'd also steal everything I could get my hands on in the clubhouse, which is why they won't let me do it.

I'm born and raised in the Northeast. My parents are Irish immigrants. So our tendency is to shy away from the big yellow ball that comes up in the sky every once in a while.

Campbell [Scott] also directed me in a film with Hope Davis called Final. That was the first thing we did together, but I've known him for years.

My nieces and my nephews think the only thing that I do is 'Ice Age.' That's fine with me because pretty soon they'll grow up enough to realize that I suck or that my time has passed, whichever it might be.