We all fall in love with the idea of a person, and then as time goes on we either accommodate ourselves to the real person or we don't.
The thing that has helped me the most has been surrounding myself with a strong community of people with common interests and relevant knowledge - other directors, artists, crew talent, and smart and fun people in other fields.
Because I also teach college, I am around a lot of young women who are just starting out, and I often see them coming up against certain expectations that may be more gender-specific.
When I was really young, I was reluctant to be perceived as bossy, and I thought that working with an ensemble was about generating a consensus all the time. Later on, I realized that it's actually generous to know what you want and to tell people what you want - actors, crew, everyone.
I know that it's common for creative people to feel like they're profoundly misunderstood but for the most part I don't feel like that. I think most of the time people read my work in the way I intend.
I will personally never ever get over the communal experience of theatrical cinema. I will never get over the scale of a big screen in relation to your small body, big sounds in a big room with a bunch of other people.
I think that is one of the things that is beautiful about fiction and that you can do through drama. If I was a detective, I could make a certain version of everything we know to be exactly true. And that would have a certain kind of truth value. And there are certain other things that we know that are emotionally true.
