Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
I'm the only man in the world with a marriage licence made out to whom it may concern.
If I ever complain to an agent about anything, he always has a pained look on his face, like, "How can you be so ungrateful? Why, Mick, I just named my yacht after you!"
Nowadays, it is fashionable for agents to be out. When you call them, they're always "out." It's in, you see, to be out. If they're in, they're out. So, they're always out. That way, they'll be in.
