My family was so poor the lady next door gave birth to me.
I still swing the way I used to, but when I look up the ball is going in a different direction.
No one who ever had lessons would have a swing like mine.
I'm a golfaholic. And all the counseling in the world wouldn't help me.
I'm hitting the driver so good I gotta dial the operator for long distance after I hit it.
[Jack Nicklaus] was the first to bring in course management. He could go to a course and tell you within one stroke what was going to win. He used to set his sights on that because he could shoot it. He was the only player I know who, if he decided he wanted to win a tournament, could go out and do it. No one will ever be as popular as Arnold Palmer and no one will ever come close to Jack as a player.
I thought I'd blown it at the 17th when I drove into a trap. God is a Mexican.
I stay away from the telephone if at all possible.
Somewhere along the line I'll be recognized as one of the top players in the Nicklaus era. That's all I want to be remembered for.
I love Merion and I don't even know her last name.
I'm actually a very quiet person off the golf course. I talk 150 miles per hour when I'm at the course, but when in private I very seldom ever open my mouth.
Nobody but you and your caddie care what you do out there, and if your caddie is betting against you, he doesn't care, either.
Yes, I think I have the best swing on the Tour. Why have scores comedown in the last ten years? Partly because they are imitating me.
You have to understand, I don't play golf for fun. It's my business. When the mailman starts delivering mail on his off day, that's when I'll start playing golf for the hell of it. I like to play in tournaments. There are many great courses around the world that I have never played that are next door to tournaments. I have not played them because I don't play for fun.
I didn't want to change the name on the towels.
There are two things that won't last long in this world, and that's dogs chasing cars and pros putting for pars.
How can they beat me? I've been struck by lightning, had two back operations, and been divorced twice.
I'm not a real smart guy. But I've got enough brains to realize that when I'm 60 years old and play a sport, that it's downhill.
A hungry dog hunts best.
If your concentration is getting bad, take up bass fishing. It will really improve your ability to focus. If you aren't ready when that fish hits, you can't set the hook.
I have an orthopedic pillow that's made out of a sponge material. I have a plate in my throat, and I have to be careful or I could end up with a bad neck in the morning. That pillow is a must everywhere I go.
I'm really going to do my homework. I'm going to be down there on the practice tee finding out if a guy's wife beat him up the night before, important stuff like that. Stuff that people want to know.
I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.
Actually, my plan was to be 20-under par after two days but it didn't work
I still sweat. My guts are still grinding out there. Sometimes I have enough cotton in my mouth to knit a sweater.
