Russell Lynes Quotes

No author dislikes to be edited as much as he dislikes not to be published.

I'd agree with you, but then we'd both be wrong.

Brains aren't everything. In fact in your case they're nothing.

Are you always this stupid or are you making a special effort today?

Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn't have given you worse advice.

Don't let you mind wander - it's far too small to be let out on its own.

I don't know what makes you so dumb but it really works.

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.

If you can't ignore an insult, top it; if you can't top it, laugh it off; and if you can't laugh it off, it's probably deserved.

A lady is a woman who makes a man behave like a gentleman.

Camouflage is a game we all like to play, but our secrets are as surely revealed by what we want to seem to be as by what we want to conceal.

Tennis is an addiction that once it has truly hooked a man will not let him go.

Sure, I'd love to help you out...now, which way did you come in?

If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative.

Sure, I've seen people like you before - but I had to pay an admission.

Cynicism is the intellectual cripple's substitute for intelligence. It is the dishonest businessman's substitute for conscience. It is the communicator's substitute, whether he is advertising man or editor or writer, for self-respect.

I'm sorry, I'm a little busy. Can i ignore you later?

Your village just called. They're missing an idiot.

Any real New Yorker is a you-name-it-we-have-it-snob whose heart brims with sympathy for the millions of unfortunates who through misfortune, misguidedness or pure stupidity live anywhere else in the world.

Friends never make assumptions about you. They never expect a reason to go out with you. In fact friends only expect you to be you.

Hi there, I'm a human being! What are you?

It is always well to accept your own shortcomings with candor but to regard those of your friends with polite incredulity.

The world of the arts is by no means always comfortable, but neither is it likely ever to be boring. It is full of surprises, humor, traps for the unwary, and challenges to smugness. It is a world of moods as well as of revelation, of beliefs and fears, of unpleasant truth as well as of delicious fantasy. Perhaps it is arrogant to say that anyone who does not venture into this world is only half-interested in life. I say it, nonetheless.

I'd love to ask how old you are, but unfortunately I know you can't count that high.

There are times when you just get down, you feel like nobody likes you. We're in high school forever. It's just what we do with it.