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Yahtzee Croshaw Quotes

The cruelest thing you can do to an artist is tell them their work is flawless when it isn't

The cruelest thing you can do to an artist is tell them their work is flawless when it isn't

Yahtzee Croshaw
Artist, Flawless, Can Do

The most I can hope for is to die in a pose that confuses future archaeologists.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Archaeologists, Dies, I Can
Yahtzee Croshaw (2012). “Jam”, p.169, Dark Horse Comics

Nothing ruins a good thing quite like knowing you share your opinions with mindless little tits.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Knowing, Littles, Ruins

If you ask me, the hypothetical zenith of gaming technology is direct neural interface - no body to hamper you and your brain is in whatever you want it to be in. Plus it leads to existential uncertainty, which could be entertaining.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Technology, Brain, Zenith

Individuals are fine once you get to know them, especially if they're interesting in conversation or have large, sumptuous breasts, but I don't like people in the plural and I've seen very little to change my mind about that.

Yahtzee Croshaw
People, Interesting, Mind

The main problem I always have with multiplayer is that human beings are grabby, entitled, selfish, ugly, stupid, evil cockstoppers.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Selfish, Stupid, Evil

I had passed on from life, from the world of struggles and hardship and big fat women with annoying laughs, and entered a glorious new existence of utter peace, and joy, and love. And then some git brought me back to life

Yahtzee Croshaw
Struggle, Laughing, Joy
Yahtzee Croshaw (2008). “Mogworld”, p.14, Dark Horse Comics

For me, Modern Warfare 3 's plot makes its signature turn around the bend when Russia invades Europe. As in, all of it. Simultaneously. Now, I've never invaded Europe, except for that one time, but I would think that's a project you might want to stagger out a bit if you haven't forged an alliance with any galactic empires lately.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Thinking, Russia, Europe

Reality is a cruel and unintuitive place with frustrating gameplay mechanics. (Press X to thanklessly toil your life away)

Yahtzee Croshaw
Real, Toil, Mechanic

So, Americans, then. Self-appointed vigilante defenders of the world, kind of like Superman, if Superman was retarded and only fought crime when he felt like it.

Yahtzee Croshaw
Self, World, Kind
Croshaw's website "Fully Ramblomatic", www.fullyramblomatic.com. July 3, 2003.

Well we've left behind the 200X's, and we move onto the 20XX's. Maybe that will finally make us feel like we're living in the future, rather than a media controlled slave state where an iPhone is worth substantially more than a human life. Happy new year.

Yahtzee Croshaw
New Year, Moving, Happy Life

He who trades pacing for gimmicky open-world freedom deserves neither.

Yahtzee Croshaw
World, Pacing, Trade

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