News Quotes - Page 31

I believe the Times is a great newspaper, but a profoundly fallible one.

Comedy makes everything accessible. Watching the news is kind of like being fed your evening pill. What's fun about it? Nothing. And so if you can get news and information about things going on in the world through a comic platform, everything's going to connect.

The hackers who hacked into Sony have leaked the upcoming script for the new James Bond movie. Some of the executives said the news left them shaken but not stirred.

We noticed recently that people didn't like it when Facebook "experimented" with their news feed. Even the FTC is getting involved. But guess what, everybody: if you use the Internet, you're the subject of hundreds of experiments at any given time, on every site. That's how websites work.

It is not an event; it is a piece of news.

That's not news! When a shark comes out of the water, walks into a 7-11, and bites you in the ass, then it's news!

Anyone who gets his or her political news primarily from the New York Times (which made the ethically challenged carpetbagger Hillary a senator) is a fool.

Washington newspaper men know everything.

Newspaper readership is still growing in India.

Criticism can never instruct or benefit you. Its chief effect is that of a telegram with dubious news. Praise leaves no glow behind, for it is a writer's habit to remember nothing good of himself. I have usually forgotten those who have admired my work, and seldom anyone who disliked it. Obviously, this is because praise is never enough and censure always too much.

The good news is that economists are intelligent, engaging and often charming folks. The bad news is their work is often of little use to investors.

Reports by Politico, Bloomberg and other news outlets have raised inconsistencies in Melania Trump's immigration story.

News, news, news - that is what we want. You cannot beat news in a newspaper.

My feelings towards the newspapers are very affectionate.

One of the things we can be sure of over the July 4th weekend is that news reports will keep telling us how many of us are going to die in automobile accidents.

Writers don't often say anything that readers don't already know, unless its a news story. A writer's greatest pleasure is revealing to people things they knew but did not know they knew. Or did not realize everyone else knew, too. This produces a warm sense of fellow feeling and is the best a writer can do.

When I was a child, I saw in the news that a person from Belitung had done well in sports in Jakarta, and I just couldn't imagine that it was possible for someone from here to become famous, and it's still very isolated out here.

The good news isn't that God is victorious. How can He not be victorious? The good news is we can be victorious, too.

It is an ill thing to be the first to bring news of ill.

Today's China is not in the least shut out from the rest of the world. Trends come to us from all over the world. And the Internet is really developed in China. We get news from all over the world.

What's the news? None, my lord, but that the world's grown honest, Then is doomsday near.

If you look up the definition of news in the dictionary, it isn't what you watch on TV.

I'm very wary of doing political stuff for a lot of reasons. One of the big ones is that the shelf-life for them is not very long, and the joke becomes old news very quickly.

The good news about psychedelics is that they are incredibly democratic. Even the clueless can be swept along if the dose is sufficient.

I am glad I worked on a newspaper because it made me know I had to write whether I felt like it or not.