Bette Midler Quotes

I have my standards. They're low, but I have them.

If you can accept your differentness and learn to love it and encourage it, then you can be someone wonderful.

Find your Light; They can't love you if they can't see you

I firmly believe that with the right footwear one can rule the world.

Life is not fair. And you have to choose your battles, because there are some that you cannot win. If you're passionate about something, then you should pick up your flag and run with it.

I haven't left my house in days. I watch the news channels incessantly. All the news stories are about the election; all the commercials are Viagra and Cialis. Election, erection, election, erection! Either way we're screwed!

If only I'd known my differentness would be an asset, then my earlier life would have been much easier.

I want it all - and I would like it delivered.

If sex is such a natural phenomenon, how come there are so many books on how to do it?

People are not the best because they work hard. They work hard because they are the best.

Make sure your life is a rare entertainment! It doesn't take anything drastic. You needn't be gorgeous or wealthy or smart, just very enthusiastic!

Group conformity scares the pants off me because it's so often a prelude to cruelty towards anyone who doesn't want to - or can't - join the Big Parade.

Cherish forever what makes you unique, 'cuz you're really a yawn if it goes.

I'm the last of the truly tacky women. I do trash with flash and sleaze with ease.

The worst part of success is to try to find someone who is happy for you.

A person's life is a journey, a road. Sometimes you go off the road and sometimes you stay on all the way through. But you are the only one on that road. It's your road.

If you pick up a ukulele, it will make you unbelievably happy.

Enough about me. What do you think about me?

Men's brains are smaller than those of women so they can fit into their penises.

I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.

Let the sun stop burning, Let them tell me love's not worth going through. If it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart, The only dream that mattered had come true ...In this life I was loved by you.

My idea of superwoman is someone who scrubs her own floors.

Self-esteem is something you have to earn! The only way to achieve self-esteem is to work hard. People have an obligation to live up to their potential.

I always try to balance the light with the heavy - a few tears of human spirit in with the sequins and the fringes.

I feel like a million tonight - but one at a time.