Dick Gregory Quotes - Page 3

America is concerned more with the possibility of moon folks than the reality of hungry poor folks.

Black folks tell their kids they have to be twice as good as a white person? Well, if I tell a child of mine that, or that they have to be careful - that this is what a cop would do if you do this - they think something is wrong with them. I tell them death is better.

When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.

I went to Ethiopia, and it dawned on me that you can tell a starving, malnourished person because they've got a bloated belly and a bald head. And I realized that if you come through any American airport and see businessmen running through with bloated bellies and bald heads, that's malnutrition, too.

No being should be killed. No being should be unloved.

The world is fed by greed.

[A politician is] a person skilled in the art of compromise. Usually an elected official who has compromised to get nominated, compromised to get elected, and compromised repeatedly to stay in office.

Black Americans are the only people in history who are for education instead of liberation. George Washington wasn't beating up on British for the right to open a college! The line isn't "Give me education or give me death."

I wouldn't mind paying taxes... if I knew they were going to a friendly country

The funniest jokes you know aren't from comics but relatives, friends - from your life. That's the funniest stuff.

There is a limit on how much information you can keep bottled up.

Black conservatives have a right to exist, but why would I want to walk around with a swastika on my shirt after the way Hitler done messed it up?

In most places in the country, voting is looked upon as a right and a duty, but in Chicago it's a sport.

Martin Luther King taught us all nonviolence. I was told to extend nonviolence to the mother and her calf.

If democracy is such a good thing, let's have more of it.

Nature is not affected by finance. If someone offered you ten thousand dollars to let them touch your eyeball without blinking, you would never collect the money. At the very last moment, Nature would force you to blink your eye. Nature will protect her own.

If it wasn't for Abe Lincoln, I'd still be on the open market.

You got to die of something because if you die of nothing, they won't pay your insurance.

Dogs are great assets to candidates, and the feeling seems to be engendered that if a dog loves the candidate, he can't be all that bad.

Revolution ain't nothing but an extent of evolution; Evolution is a fact of nature. So when old folks tell me that they don't understand hip hop and the music is too loud, well I guess it means you're not supposed to be in there.

Every holiday on the calendar, I check in a hotel and fast - I don't eat, I don't drink, I don't talk.

We thought I was going to be a great athlete, and we were wrong, and I thought I was going to be a great entertainer, and that wasn't it either. I'm going to be an American Citizen. First class.

Pets are found to suffer from all the ailments known to the human.

If you can justify killing to eat meat, you can justify the conditions of the ghetto. I cannot justify either one.

I would have painted the White House black. I would have!