Laughing can serve you in dark moments and even help you crawl your way back out.
Any kind of crisis can be good. It wakes you up.
When you have expectations, you are setting yourself up for disappointment.
I don't expect success. I prepare for it.
I learned discipline from my father. Not in terms of corporal punishment, but being determined in whatever you do, and sticking with it.
Are you stalking me? Because that would be super.
The ‘friend zone’ is like the penalty box of dating, only you can never get out. Once a girl decides you’re her ‘friend,’ it’s game over. You’ve become a complete non-sexual entity in her eyes, like her brother, or a lamp.
I just love bikes. It's not the safest passion to have, but I guess it's better than Russian roulette.
I think you have to let go of this idea that you can be precious about everything, and let it be the abstract mess that it is.
If you're going to commit to that, you're going to have to find some way to make it bearable and enjoyable.
I'll do whatever it takes for a movie. I don't really care what that is.
I hope that I'm always satisfied and content like I am right at this very moment.
Wouldn't that be an amazing super power? Knowing where to press on someone's neck to make them immediately urinate.
I finally had my prostate checked. And I was super-thankful that I taught my asshole to whistle before the doctor stuck his finger in there. The look on his face was priceless.
I've always relied on discipline to achieve goals great and small. At a young age, my father instilled a real work ethic in me - and a fear of men. I always felt like if I didn't have a natural knack for something, I could kind of out-discipline the competition as it were. So I would always work as hard as I possibly could, sometimes to my own detriment and my personal life. For me, I think will power and discipline are very synonymous.
I never took acting classes, but I knew I could do it based on the skill with which I lied to my parents on a regular basis!
People have their complexities. They have their heroic moments and their villainous moments, too.
We might be too proud to admit it as guys, but we still need to learn how to manage responsibility, how to face our challenges.
There are so few surprises left in life. We've gotten so addicted to knowing. It's the Google generation. We want the answer to everything right now!
I think every relationship is going to go through a few rough patches. Those are what make it stronger, I think.
Everyone thinks their baby is a genius. People find it delightfully refreshing when I tell them, My baby? Totally average. Like, 100 percent average.
Bringing any movie together is a minor miracle.
I dragged my wife from our honeymoon in Africa and landed her in Ontario, Canada, when it was -40 degrees.
If it weren’t so off-putting for my co-workers. I’d wear my flannel, one-piece 'Hannah Montana' pajamas, like, all the time!
Guys are lucky: We can wear a suit over and over, just with different shirts and ties.
