Golf Quotes - Page 48

If golf wasn't enjoyable and there wasn't a lot of humor and enjoyment, even though the game is so frustrating, you would wonder why you put yourself through it.

I'm used to the golf course playing soft, so tomorrow I'm going to have to pay attention a little bit more.

Hitting a golf ball correctly is the most sophisticated and complicated maneuver in all of sports, with the possible exception of eating a hot dog at a ball game without getting mustard on your shirt.

I found that golf saved me from going to the pub every day so instead I play golf with other unemployed actors. I'm a member of the Stage Golfing Society and I play golf with all sorts of people.

Your confidence is the 15th club in your bag. You'd like it to be a thick headed driver. But it sometimes seems like a pretty weak little stick.

Golf is the loneliest of games, not excluding postal chess.

Water creates a neurosis in golfers. The very thought of this harmless fluid robs them of their normal powers of rational thought, turns their legs to jelly, and produces a palsy of the upper limbs.

Rule One: Whenever a spectator seeks out a really good vantage point and settles down on shooting stick or canvas chair, the tallest and fattest golf watcher on the course will take up station directly in front.

Have you ever actually listened to golfers talking to each other? "Looked good starting out..." "Better direction than last time..." "Who's away?..." It sounds like visitors' day at a home for the criminally insane.

He used to be fairly indecisive, but now he's not so certain.

I admire the way golfers handle themselves. But tennis players are a lot younger, as a rule. There aren't many teenagers on the golf tour.

Tiger is the greatest thing that's happened to the tour in a long time. He has brought incredible attention to golf at a time of year when football and the World Series always take precedence. Everything I've heard about him seems to be true.

If you can't laugh at yourself, then how can you laugh at anybody else? I think people see the human side of you when you do that.

The worst advice in golf is, 'Keep your head down.'

To help your concentration, don't take too much time.

It was a morning when all nature shouted Fore! The breeze, as it blew gently up from the valley, seemed to bring a message of hope and cheer, whispering of chip shots holed and brassies landing squarely on the meat. The fairway, as yet unscarred by the irons of a hundred dubs, smiled greenly up at the azure sky.

"After all, golf is only a game", said Millicent. Women say these things without thinking. It does not mean that there is any kink in their character. They simply don't realise what they are saying.

The basic philosophy behind [switch putting] is you always want a hook putt. So for a left-to-right breaking putt, you're going to want to hit it left-handed and vice versa.

I'm a big believer in the Wii. I love the physicality of the Wii controller, and how you can get the feeling of throwing a bowling ball or swinging a golf club. Those are the kinds of games I really like.

If anything, more kids that want to get good at golf will get fine-tuned. It's factual. It's science, how to build a golfer. I think that's huge.

The pressure makes me more intent about each shot. Pressure on the last few holes makes me play better.

Golf is a difficult game, but it's a little easier if you trust your instincts. It's too hard a game to try to play like someone else.

Bad Sausage and five bogeys will give you a stomach ache every time.

The beauty of golf, you're in charge out here.

Golf is the only game that pits the player against an opponent, the weather, the minutest details of a large chunk of local topography and his own nervous system, all at the same time.