Frank Zappa Quotes - Page 9

Mr. Gorbachev has apparently stumbled onto one of the best-kept secrets in recent Soviet history: Communism doesn't work.

I write the music I like. If other people like it, fine, they can go buy the albums. And if they don't like it, there's always Michael Jackson for them to listen to.

Scientists believe that the universe is made of hydrogen because they claim it's the most plentiful ingredient. I claim that the most plentiful ingredient is stupidity.

All the old history was written for the amusement of the ruling classes. The lower classes couldn't read, and their rulers didn't care about remembering what happened to them.

I detest 'love lyrics.' I think one of the causes of bad mental health in the United States is that people have been raised on 'love lyrics.

Just be glad you don't live in one of those little countries where at this very moment, music is severely restricted, or as it is in Iran, totally illegal.

I don't think there's a problem. First of all, I don't think music turns people into social liabilities. Because you hear a lyric

My balls feel like a pair of maracas.

The manner in which Americans ''consume'' music has a lot to do with leaving it on their coffee tables, or using it as wallpaper for their lifestyles, like the score of a movie --it's consumed that way without any regard for how and why it's made.

Tosses her head and flips her hair, she got a whole bunch of nothing in there.

Find her, blind her, see who designed her. Act like a dummy until you grind her.

My school spirit is at an all time low, I'm losing my status at the school.

This is a stupid song and that's the way I like it.

The minute you use the drugs, and you do something that interferes with the life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness of the guy next door, you're a criminal, and you ought to be punished for that especially if you're in a position where your actions could affect large numbers of people. Being a doctor, a legislator, a judge, an airline pilot, where somebody's life depends on you.

There isn't anything weird about my music.

Never bend over for a Christian.

Producing satire is kind of hopeless because of the literacy rate of the American public.

I want a steamy little Jewish Princess with over-worked gums, who squeaks when she cums. I don't want no troll, I just want a Yemenite hole.

I mean, if you want to hurt yourself, go ahead. It's like, if you want to jack off, go ahead, just don't 'spoo' on a public bus or something . Do whatever you want to do. Just don't get it in somebody else's face.

I have been monitoring your earthly broadcasts for many years.

On the Planet of Baritone women, they talk low.

You don't think I work 14 hours a day right now?! I mean, I still put in the hours, I still do the work.

Anybody hear the great news, today? Jimmy Swaggart under investigation! Oh Ja-eezus! One day every one of those cocksuckers will get caught! I understand in the case of Mr. Swaggart, that he claims that it was not multiple encounters with many prostitutes - apparently, only one sweet young thing. And he did tell Cal Thomas of the Moral Majority that the sex act itself was not fully consumated. However he did admit to doing something por-no-graphic with the girl. Let's use our imaginations, ladies and gentlemen.

She lives in Mojave in a Winnebago. His name is Bobby, he looks like a potato.

I think you should leave it up to the parent, because not all parents want to keep their children totally ignorant.