Bill Watterson Quotes

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.

I asked mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn't have paid for me.

The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive.

Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement. In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive... To invent your own life's meaning is not easy, but it's still allowed, and I think you'll be happier for the trouble.

I let my mind wander and it didn't come back.

Know what's weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything's different.

My whole problem is that my lips move when I think.

God put me on this earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now I am so far behind that I will never die.

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.

I don't think I'd have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I'd known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.

We're so busy watching out for what's just ahead of us that we don't take time to enjoy where we are.

The problem with the future is that it keeps turning into the present.

Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words.

I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.

I'm related to people I don't relate to.

Tomorrow we'll not only seize the day, we'll throttle it.

Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray. You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing. Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk. Hobbes: You're ignorant, but at least you act on it.

I know the world isn't fair, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?

Letting your mind play is the best way to solve problems.

What's the point of wearing your favorite rocket ship underpants if nobody ever asks to see 'em?

Boy, there's nothing worse than an inscrutable omen.

History is the fiction we invent to persuade ourselves that events are knowable and that life has order and direction. That's why events are always reinterpreted when values change. We need new versions of history to allow for our current prejudices.

I wish people were more like animals. Animals don't try to change you or make you fit in. They just enjoy the pleasure of your company. Animals aren't conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you're sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.

To invent your own life's meaning is not easy, but it's still allowed, and I think you'll be happier for the trouble.