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Douglas Adams Quotes about Funny

All Douglas Adams Quotes Alcohol Art Arthur Assumption Atheism Atheist Beach Belief Challenges Children Coffee Difficulty Earth Exercise Experience Feelings Flying Food Fun Funny quotes Giving Gold Heart House Inspiration Inspirational Integrity Intelligence Internet Journey Language Leaving Life Logic Love Lying Money Monk Morning Nature Opportunity Past Philosophy Pleasure Quality Rain Reality Religion Responsibility Running Science Simplicity Strategy Stress Tea Technology Time Understanding Universe Waiting War Water Winning Work Out Writing

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.

Inspirational, Funny, Fake People

Douglas Adams (2012). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Trilogy of Five”, p.690, Pan Macmillan

In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.

Funny, God, Crazy

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy "Fit the Fifth" (radio program) (1978)

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

Funny, Education, Wisdom

Douglas Adams, Mark Carwardine (2011). “Last Chance to See”, p.132, Ballantine Books

The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at and repair.

Funny, Engineering, Differences

Douglas Adams (2012). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Trilogy of Five”, p.691, Pan Macmillan

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Funny, Witty, Fear

Douglas Adams (2012). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Radio Scripts Volume 2: The Tertiary, Quandary and Quintessential Phases”, p.83, Pan Macmillan

He was a dreamer, a thinker, a speculative philosopher... or, as his wife would have it, an idiot.

Funny, Dream, Wife

Douglas Adams (2009). “The Restaurant at the End of the Universe”, p.53, Pan Macmillan

Nothing travels faster than the speed of light, with the possible exception of bad news, which obeys its own special laws.

Funny, Science, Light

Douglas Adams (2012). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: The Trilogy of Five”, p.622, Pan Macmillan

It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression, 'As pretty as an airport.

Inspirational, Funny, Travel

1988 The Long Dark Tea- Time of the Soul, ch.1.

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer

Funny, Witty, Humor

There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.There is another theory which states that this has already happened.

Funny, Education, Humor

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy "Fit the Seventh" (radio program) (1978)

Space is big. Really big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist, but that's just peanuts to space.

Funny, Believe, Mean

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, vol.1". Book by Douglas Adams, 2009.

Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.

Funny, Jobs, Responsibility

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy "Fit the Twelfth" (radio program) (1980) See Twain 14

Alone of all the races on earth, they seem to be free from the 'Grass is Greener on the other side of the fence' syndrome, and roundly proclaim that Australia is, in fact, the other side of that fence.

Funny, Humor, Race

It is difficult to be sat on all day, every day, by some other creature, without forming an opinion on them. On the other hand, it is perfectly possible to sit all day, every day, on top of another creature and not have the slightest thought about them whatsoever.

Funny, Humorous, Hands

Douglas Adams (2014). “Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency”, p.5, Simon and Schuster

The idea that Bill Gates (one of the founders of Microsoft) has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he, by peddling second rate technology, led them into it in the first place...

Funny, Humor, Technology

"Biting back at Microsoft" by Paul Mooney, www.theguardian.com. June 5, 2001.

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fibre and that I am therefore excused from saving universes.

Funny, Humor, Doctors

Douglas Adams (2012). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Radio Scripts Volume 2: The Tertiary, Quandary and Quintessential Phases”, p.42, Pan Macmillan

The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don't.

Funny, Hilarious, Laughter

Douglas Adams (2009). “The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy”, p.26, Pan Macmillan

There is a feeling which persists in England that making a sandwich interesting, attractive, or in any way pleasant to eat is something sinful that only foreigners do.

Funny, Humorous, Interesting

Douglas Adams (2009). “So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish”, p.52, Pan Macmillan

Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.

Funny, Life, Orange

Earthmen are not proud of their ancestors and never invite them round to dinner.

Funny, Family, Food

"Fictional character: The Book". "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy/ Episode #1.1", www.imdb.com. January 1981.

Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen. [...] Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.

Funny, Prayer, Knowing

"Mostly Harmless". Book by Douglas Adams, Chapter 9, 1992.

Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer.

Funny, Laughter, Prayer

Douglas Adams (2009). “Mostly Harmless”, p.71, Pan Macmillan

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