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H. L. Mencken Quotes about Funny

All H. L. Mencken Quotes Achievement Adultery Adventure Age Alcohol Arguing Art Atheism Atheist Beer Belief Business Change Character Children Choices College Comedy Common Sense Communism Conscience Conspiracy Cooking Country Courage Criticism Critics Culture Cynicism Death Democracy Determination Devil Difficulty Dignity Doubt Drinking Dying Earth Education Effort Ethics Evil Exercise Faith Fear Feelings Fighting Food Free Speech Freedom Funny quotes Genius Giving God Golf Happiness Hate Heart Heaven Hell History Home Honesty Honor House Humanity Husband Ignorance Imagination Inspirational Intelligence Intuition Journalism Joy Judging Justice Kissing Knowledge Language Laughter Learning Liberty Life Literature Logic Love Lying Marriage Military Money Moon Morality Music Nature Office Originality Passion Past Patriotism Peace Personality Philosophy Politics Pot Poverty Prejudice Progress Propaganda Quality Quitting Reading Religion Respect Revolution Running Safety School Science Science And Religion Skins Slavery Society Son Sports Struggle Stupidity Style Success Suffering Sunday Sympathy Teaching Temptation Time Today Tragedy Trust Truth Virtue Voting Waiting War Water Weakness Wife Wisdom Work Writing Youth

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

Funny, Heart, Land

The Baltimore Sun, July 26, 1920.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Funny, Badass, Anger

H. L. Mencken, Marion Elizabeth Rodgers (2010). “H.L. Mencken: Prejudices: First, Second, and Third Series”, Hubsta Ltd

Freedom of press is limited to those who own one.

Funny, Freedom, Political

A man may be a fool and not know it, but not if he is married.

Funny, Anniversary, Marriage

H.L. Mencken “A little book in C major”, Рипол Классик

A cynic is a man who, when he smells flowers, looks around for a coffin.

Funny, Flower, Humor

A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to Heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there.

Funny, Humor, Heaven

"A Little Book in C Major".

The cynics are right nine times out of ten.

Funny, Witty, Time

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.

Funny, Witty, Humorous

A judge is a law student who marks his own examination papers.

Funny, Law, Justice

On one issue, at least, men and women agree. They both distrust women.

Funny, Hilarious, Women

H.L. Mencken “A little book in C major”, Рипол Классик

The common argument that crime is caused by poverty is a kind of slander on the poor.

Funny, Humor, Criminals

H.L. Mencken (2013). “Minority Report”, p.271, Knopf

Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

Love, Funny, Marriage

Immorality: the morality of those who are having a better time.

Funny, Crazy, Silly

A Book of Burlesques ch. 11 (1920)

Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.

Funny, Anniversary, Marriage

H.L. Mencken “A little book in C major”, Рипол Классик

Conscience is the inner voice that warns us that someone might be looking.

Funny, Life, Freedom

All men are frauds. The only difference between them is that some admit it. I myself deny it.

Funny, Men, Differences

Dachshund: A half-a-dog high and a dog-and-a-half long.

Funny, Dog, Long

Say what you will about the ten commandments, you must always come back to the pleasant fact that there are only ten of them.

Funny, Laughter, Freedom

God is a Republican, and Santa Claus is a Democrat.

Funny, Humorous, Party

There are two kinds of music; German music and bad music.

Funny, Music, Humorous

Shave a gorilla and it would be almost impossible, at twenty paces, to distinguish him from a heavyweight champion of the world. Skin a chimpanzee, and it would take an autopsy to prove he was not a theologian.

Funny, Humor, Champion

Baltimore Evening Sun, April 4, 1927.

In the main, there are two sorts of books: those that no one reads and those that no one ought to read.

Funny, Book, Reading

"A little book in C major".

I go on working for the same reason that a hen goes on laying eggs.

Inspirational, Funny, Humor

Archbishop - A Christian ecclesiastic of a rank superior to that attained by Christ.

Funny, Christian, Humorous

A Little Book in C Major ch. 4 (1916)

Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later; for another thing, they die earlier.

Funny, Relationship, Marriage

Chrestomathy (1949) ch. 30

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