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Robert Benchley Quotes about Children

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In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

Robert Benchley
Travel, Children, Airplane
Pluck and Luck (1925)

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.

Robert Benchley
Dog, Children, Pet
Robert Benchley (1976). “Chips Off the Old Benchley”, Amereon Limited

Central Park is the grandiose symbol of the front yard each child in New York hasn't got.

Robert Benchley
New York, Children, Central Park

Traveling with children corresponds roughly to traveling third class in Bulgaria.

Robert Benchley
Children, Class, Modern Life
Robert Benchley (2010). “The Athletic Benchley: 105 Exercises from the Detroit Athletic Club News”, p.25, Glendower Media

There are two ways to travel, first class or with children.

Robert Benchley
Children, Class, Two

A child of three cannot raise its chubby fist to its mouth to remove a piece of carpet which it is through eating, without being made the subject of a psychological seminar of child-welfare experts, and written up, along with five hundred other children of three who have put their hands to their mouths for the same reason.

Robert Benchley
Children, Hands, Childhood
Robert Benchley (1970). “Benchley Lost and Found: 39 Prodigal Pieces”, p.69, Courier Corporation

In a house where there are small children the bathroom soon takes on the appearance of the Old Curiosity Shop.

Robert Benchley
Children, House, Curiosity
Robert Benchley (1943). “Benchley beside himself”

There are several natural phenomena which I shall have to have explained to me before I can keep on going as a resident member ofthe human race. One is the metamorphosis which hats and suits undergo exactly one week after their purchase, whereby they are changed from smart, intensely becoming articles of apparel into something children use when they want to "dress up like daddy.

Robert Benchley
Children, Smart, Race
Robert Benchley (1946). “20,000 leagues under the sea: or, David Copperfield”

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