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George Bernard Shaw Quotes about Funny

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Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the aeroplane, the pessimist the parachute.

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the aeroplane, the pessimist the parachute.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Motivational, Humorous

A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Witty
Everybody's Political What's What? ch. 30 (1944)

The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Senior, Time
Attributed in "Teaching as a Subversive Activity" by Neil Postman and Charles Weingartner, 1971.

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Wisdom, Country

The secret to success is to offend the greatest number of people.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Work, Congratulations

We learn from history that we learn nothing from history.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Humor, History

The trouble with her is that she lacks the power of conversation but not the power of speech.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Sarcastic, Communication

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Life, Drinking

Every man over forty is a scoundrel.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Birthday, Time
Man and Superman "Maxims for Revolutionists" (1903)

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Forever, Eulogy
From his Preface on Doctors published with The Doctor's Dilemma (1911)

I believe in the discipline of silence, and could talk for hours about it.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Believe

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: he is always convinced that it says what he means.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Life
"Our Theatres In The Nineties". Book by George Bernard Shaw, 1932.

Clever and attractive women do not want to vote; they are willing to let men govern as long as they govern men.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Witty, Clever

Do not do unto others as you expect they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Life, Marriage
"Maxims for Revolutionists (#1)". Book by George Bernard Shaw, 1903.

We learn from experience that men never learn anything from experience.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Witty, Learning

A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Hate
An Unsocial Socialist (1887) ch. 5

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Happy Birthday, Family
"Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

The perfect love affair is one which is conducted entirely by post.

George Bernard Shaw
Love, Funny, Humor

A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Witty, Fashion

Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that men never learn anything from history.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Men
"Heartbreak House: A Fantasia in the Russian Manner on English Themes".

Two people getting together to write a book is like three people getting together to have a baby. One of them is superfluous.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Baby, Book

The play was a great success, but audience was a dismal failure.

George Bernard Shaw
Inspirational, Funny, Play

Home is the girl's prison and the woman's workhouse.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Girl, Home
Man and Superman (1903) "Maxims for Revolutionists: Women in the Home"

A doctor's reputation is made by the number of eminent men who die under his care.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Humorous, Men
George Bernard Shaw (1988). “Collected letters: 1926-1950”, Vintage

Every dream is a prophecy: every jest is an earnest in the womb of Time.

George Bernard Shaw
Funny, Dream, Womb
George Bernard Shaw (2004). “John Bull's Other Island”, p.164, 1st World Publishing

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