Marshall B. Rosenberg Quotes about Communication - Page 2

Get very clear about the kind of world we would like and then start living that way.

Power-Over leads to punishment and violence. Power-With leads to compassion and understanding, and to learning motivated by reverence for life rather than fear, guilt, shame, or anger.

Conflicts, even of long standing duration, can be resolved if we can just keep the flow of communication going in which people come out of their heads and stop criticizing and analyzing each other, and instead get in touch with their needs, and hear the needs of others, and realize the interdependence that we all have in relation to each other. We can't win at somebody else's expense. We can only fully be satisfied when the other person's needs are fulfilled as well as our own.

Don't hate the circumstance, you may miss the blessing

When our communication supports compassionate giving and receiving, happiness replaces violence and grieving.

Children need far more than basic skills in reading, writing, and math, as important as those might be. Children also need to learn how to think for themselves, how to find meaning in what they learn, and how to work and live together.

Fear of punishment diminishes self-esteem and goodwill.

The more we talk about the past, the less we heal from it.

Never do anything that isn't play.

Punishment also includes judgmental labeling and the withholding of privileges.

All human actions are an attempt to meet needs.

Understanding and connection can transcend conflict.

With every choice you make, be conscious of what need it serves.

The most dangerous of all behaviors may consist of doing things 'because we're supposed to.

In nonviolent communication, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests. Then we may wish to reflect back, paraphrasing what we have understood. We stay with empathy, allowing others the opportunity to fully express themselves before we turn our attention to solutions or requests for relief.

Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison); 2. Denial of Responsibility; 3. Demand; 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.

All people ever say is: THANK YOU (a celebration of life) and PLEASE (an opportunity to make life more wonderful).

A need is life seeking expression within us.

Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.

As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.

Never hear what somebody thinks about you, you'll live longer. Hear that they're in pain. Don't hear their analysis.

I'm going to show you a technology today which takes insults and criticisms out of the airwaves. (Marshall puts on giraffe ears) With this technology, it will be impossible for you to hear criticisms, harsh remarks, or insults. All you can hear is what all people are ever saying, "please" and "thank you". What used to sound like criticism, judgment, or blame, you will see, are really tragic, suicidal expressions of "please".

The number one reason that we don't get our needs met, we don't express them. We express judgments. If we do express needs, the number two reasons we don't our needs met, we don't make clear requests.

People don't make us angry, how we think makes us angry.

Most of us live in a Jackal world where we take turns using the other person as a waste basket for our words.