I do not like sports, unless you consider treating all humankind with love and respect a sport.
People in New York love having roof parties.
I like Cilantro, but you don't have to.
If I'm at a party and someone puts on a Blues Brothers tape, I tend to go nuts.
I don't ban bloggers from my shows. I have a separate line: VIP seating for bloggers.
If you see me at a restaurant, blow me a kiss, wave, blow me another kiss, then walk five steps backward.
I've had shows where you think, "Is this going well? I can't tell," and then you say goodnight and you get this ovation. They're sorta like a theater audience. I've learned that much; that they're not always going to be doing backflips - but I'll never figure it out. Because sometimes you walk up there, and they're so excited, and then other times, it's just... But sometimes an audience is bad, and you can tell them they're bad, and that sort of breaks the ice a bit.
Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days.
I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place
I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase
I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that
My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.
I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable.
Sometimes they're all collectively thinking, "Wow, we're kinda a shitty audience," and then if you point it out, it's kinda like, "Hey, I know what's going on. We know what's going on up here. Or what's not going on. And I'm letting you know that I know. And now we can fix this."
Comedy clubs are a bit more expensive. That's the problem with some of these places. But the flipside of that is, if you do too many shows for free or $5, then people don't understand why you can't fly to Milwaukee and do a show for a $3 cover. That won't even pay for my flight.
I will not be misquoted!
I mean, I guess I started during the comedy boom, so it was literally like, on Sunday you could decide you wanted to be a comic, and on Monday, you could be on stage
Anyone who bombs is my friend.
I wasn't as nervous as I thought I would be when I started
I mean, I've had bartenders and waiters and waitresses make a comment about a joke of mine, like pointing out some sort of logic error or something that I've never even thought about, and they're right.
And the goal really is to make the audience laugh, to bring them some joy.
I haven't done a lot in London. I think comedy over there is how it was over here years ago. There's tons of it, and they're better paid.
I don't really know much about pirates, or pirate culture. I'd be a contrarian pirate.
There are certain things that are probably too mean. I don't particularly like fat jokes. Those kind of bother me. But I guess what I was trying to say is, if I said I would never laugh at this, you could probably dig around and find a situation where I did laugh. I try not to be a hypocrite with that one. I find when there's a controversy about someone saying something offensive, I usually take the angle of, "Well, I don't know if that was offensive; it just wasn't funny." I generally don't gasp, "Oh my God!" I think people have been getting raked over the coals lately.
It's cool to go to a place that has posters up and it's one night only. It feels more special.
