Funny Love Quotes - Page 3

Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

A lover tries to stand in well with the pet dog of the house.

Well, you know, the definition of second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

My brother is gay and my parents don't care, as long as he marries a doctor.

You know it's love when you want to keep holding hands even after you're sweaty.

On quiet nights, when I'm alone, I like to run our wedding video backwards, just to watch myself walk out of the church a free man.

You can't make someone love you, all you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in

Respectable people do not write music or make love as a career.

You know it's love when you want to give joy and damn the consequences.

I don't have a boyfriend right now. I'm looking for anyone with a job that I don't have to support.

But even if we take matrimony at its lowest, even if we regard it as no more than a sort of friendship recognised by the police, there must be degrees in the freedom and sympathy realised, and some principle to guide simple folk in their selection.

You can't put a price tag on preparation for a pandemic.

Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another.

Don't let love interfere with your appetite. It never does with mine.

Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.

Why is commitment such a big problem for a man? I think that for some reason when a man is driving down that freeway of love, the woman he's with is like an exit, but he doesn't want to get off there. He wants to keep driving. And the woman is like, "Look, gas, food, lodging, that's our exit, that's everything we need to be happy... Get off here, now!" But the man is focusing on the sign underneath that says, "Next exit 27 miles," and he thinks, "I can make it."

Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it.

I'm dating a woman now who, evidently, is unaware of it.

The triumph of hope over experience.

I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?

First love is a kind of vaccination which saves a man from catching the complaint the second time.

Romantic love is mental illness. But it's a pleasurable one.

My wife gets all the money I make. I just get an apple and clean clothes every morning.

We were so young, so in love, and so in debt.

My best birth control now is just to leave the lights on.