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Jay Leno Quotes about Giving

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Before we give the government any more money, show us some receipts.

Before we give the government any more money, show us some receipts.

Government, Giving, More Money

Nineteen percent of doctors say that they'd be able to give their patients a lethal injection. But they also went on to say that the patient would have to be really, really behind on payments.

Doctors, Medicine, Giving

Family planning experts are now recommending giving men vasectomy gift cards for the holidays. Talk about taking the jingle out of the bells.

Holiday, Men, Giving

President Obama met with leaders of the American Indian tribes and they honored the president by giving him his own Indian name: Running Deficits.

Running, Names, Giving

The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree...and think 25 to life would be appropriate.

Thinking, Giving, Would Be

If you give everybody a slice of pie, you will still have more than enough.

Inspirational, Pie, Giving

Interview with Oprah, www.oprah.com. February 2003.

Anybody who gives their car to a valet isn't a car guy

Giving, Car, Guy

Chris Christie won by such a wide margin that pundits say this will give him the impetus he needs to run for president. And he's got a new slogan: 'Put the oval in the Oval Office.'

Running, Giving, Office

There's this big pie in show business, and you physically can't eat the whole pie. If you give everybody a slice of pie, you will still have more than enough. The real trick is not to try to get the whole pie, but to keep the biggest slice.

Real, Pie, Giving

"Oprah Talks to Jay Leno". Interview with Oprah Winfrey, www.oprah.com. February, 2003.

When you fix something with your hands it gives you a sense of accomplishment and a sense of self worth.

Self Worth, Hands, Giving

According to the L.A. Times, Attorney General John Ashcroft wants to take "a harder stance" on the death penalty. What's a harder stance on the death penalty? We're already killing the guy? How do you take a harder stance on the death penalty? What, are you going to tickle him first? Give him itching powder? Put a thumbtack on the electric chair?

Giving, Guy, Want

If any job should give you a company car, it's the car bomb business.

Jobs, Giving, Car

Pundits are saying that President Obama is starting to lose support among his own party. To give you an idea of how bad it's gotten, today Jimmy Carter compared him to Jimmy Carter.

Party, Ideas, Giving

BP CEO Tony Hayward said he would just like to get his life back. He wants to get his life back. You know, I say give him life plus 20.

Giving, Want, Said

To give you an idea how bad the American economy is, Mexico is now calling for a fence along the border. Stay on your side!

Your Side, Ideas, Giving

I love all these politicians, they all say the same thing - 'We'll give California back to the people.' Yeah, great, now that it's not worth anything, they want to give it back to us.

California, People, Giving

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