Kin Hubbard Quotes - Page 4

Kindness goes a long ways lots of times when it ought to stay at home.

A grouch escapes so many little annoyances that it almost pays to be one.

Nothing is as irritating as the fellow who chats pleasantly while he's overcharging you.

Litigation: A form of hell whereby money is transferred from the pockets of the proletariat to that of lawyers.

Never tell the box-office man that you can't hear well or he will sell you a seat where you can't see either.

Of all the unbearable nuisances, the ignoramus that has traveled is the worst.

Very often the quiet fellow has said all he knows

No matter how much strong black coffee we drink, almost any after- dinner speech will counteract it.

Experience is a dear teacher but he delivers th' goods.

Universal peace sounds ridiculous to the head of an average family.

A lot of Thanksgiving days have been ruined by not carving the turkey in the kitchen.

The world gets better every day - then worse again in the evening.

Don't a fellow feel good after he gets out of a store where he nearly bought something.

The election is not very far off when a candidate can recognize you across the street.

Nothing dispels enthusiasm like a small admission fee.

Only one fellow in ten thousand understands the currency question, and we meet him every day.

It ain't a bad plan to keep still occasionally even when you know what you're talking about.

Every father expects his boy to do the things he wouldn't do when he was young.

A loafer always has the correct time.

Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble.

As to those who hoard gold and silver and spend it not in God's path, give them, then, the tidings of a painful agony: on a day when these things shall be heated in hell-fire, and their foreheads, and their sides, and their backs shall be branded therewith.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

Ther's still a few honest folks left but they never seem t' find anything you lose.

Lack of pep is often mistaken for patience.

If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on a vacation.