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Terry Pratchett Quotes - Page 22

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There's a door, he whispered. Where does it go? It stays where it is, I think, said Rincewind.

"There's a door," he whispered. "Where does it go?" "It stays where it is, I think," said Rincewind.

Terry Pratchett
Thinking, Doors, Doe
"Eric (Discworld, Book 9)". Book by Terry Pratchett (p. 86), 1990.

at least nine-tenths of all the original reality ever created lies outside the multiverse, and since the multiverse by definition includes absolutely everything that is anything, this puts a bit of a strain on things. Outside the boundaries of the universe lie the raw realities, the could-have-beens, the might-bes, the never-weres, the wild ideas, all being created and uncreated chaotically like elements in fermenting supernovas. Just occasionally where the walls of the worlds have worn a bit thin, they can leak in.

Terry Pratchett
Wall, Lying, Reality

She was a beefy young woman and, whatever piece of music she was playing, it was definitely losing.

Terry Pratchett
Pieces, Losing, Young
"Moving Pictures". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1990.

The Captain of the Watch says if you're still in the City by sunrise he will personally have you buried alive.

Terry Pratchett
Cities, Sunrise, Watches
Terry Pratchett (2009). “Soul Music: (Discworld Novel 16)”, p.331, Random House

And our lady friend, she thinks life works like a fairy tale.' Well, that’s harmless, isn’t it?' Yeah, but in fairy tales, when someone dies... it’s just a word.

Terry Pratchett
Thinking, Fairy Tale, Yeah
Terry Pratchett (2008). “The Amazing Maurice and his Educated Rodents: (Discworld Novel 28)”, p.87, Random House

The dwarfs can turn lead into gold... It reached the pointy ears of the dwarfs. -Can we? -Damned if I know. I can't. -Yeah, but if you could, you wouldn't say. I wouldn't say, if I could. -Can you? -No! -Ah-ha!

Terry Pratchett
Gold, Ears, Yeah

[Science fiction is] out in the mainstream now. You can tell by the way mainstream literary authors pillage SF while denying they're writing it!

Terry Pratchett
Writing, Fiction, Way

Look, that's why there's rules, understand? So that you think before you break 'em.

Terry Pratchett
Thinking, Looks, Ems
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Thief Of Time: (Discworld Novel 26)”, p.251, Random House

Tragic heroes always moan when the gods take an interest in them, but it's the people the gods ignore who get the really tough deals

Terry Pratchett
Hero, People, Tough
Terry Pratchett (2009). “Mort: (Discworld Novel 4)”, p.16, Random House

Why not? If enough people believe, you can be god of anything.

Terry Pratchett
Believe, People, Why Not

It was amazing how many friends you could make by being bad at things, provided you were bad enough to be funny.

Terry Pratchett
Enough, Being Bad, Many Friends

No more words. We know them all, all the words that should not be said. But you have made my world more perfect.

Terry Pratchett
Goodbye, Perfect, World
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Nation”, p.394, Random House

Would a minute have mattered? No, probably not, although his young son appeared to have a very accurate internal clock. Possibly even 2 minutes would be okay. Three minutes, even. You could go to five minutes, perhaps. But that was just it. If you could go for five minutes, then you'd go to ten, then half an hour, a couple of hours...and not see your son all evening. So that was that. Six o'clock, prompt. Every day. Read to young Sam. No excuses. He'd promised himself that. No excuses. No excuses at all. Once you had a good excuse, you opened the door to bad excuses.

Terry Pratchett
Couple, Son, Excuse You
"Thud!". Book by Terry Pratchett, 2005.

I wonder if it's like this for mountain climbers, he thought. You climb bigger and bigger mountains and you know that one day one of them is going to be just that bit too steep. But you go on doing it, because it’s so-o good when you breathe the air up there. And you know you'll die falling.

Terry Pratchett
Fall, Air, One Day

-Oh yes? Can you identify yourself? -Certainly. I'd know me anywhere.

Terry Pratchett
Funny, Witty, Know Me

Some people think this is paranoia, but it isn't. Paranoids only think everyone is out to get them. Wizards know it.

Terry Pratchett
Thinking, People, Wizards
"Sourcery". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1988.

It as true that normal people couldn't hear Gaspode speak, because dogs don't speak. It's a well know fact. ... Besides, almost all dogs don't talk. Ones that do are merely a statistical error, and can therefore be ignored.

Terry Pratchett
Dog, Errors, People

...the little man's total obliviousness to all forms of danger somehow made danger so discouraged that it gave up and went away.

Terry Pratchett
Men, Littles, Discouraged
Terry Pratchett (2009). “The Light Fantastic: (Discworld Novel 2)”, p.28, Random House

There would be a price... But if you were worried about the price, then why were you in the shop?

Terry Pratchett
Would Be, Worried, Shops

Neither claimed any responsibility for Milton Keynes, but both reported it as a success.

Terry Pratchett
Responsibility, Keynes, Milton
Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett (2011). “Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch”, p.44, Harper Collins

You take a bunch of people who don't seem any different from you and me, but when you add them all together you get this sort of huge raving maniac with national borders and an anthem.

Terry Pratchett
People, Together, Different
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Monstrous Regiment: (Discworld Novel 31)”, p.23, Random House

Whole new theories of money were growing here like mushrooms: in the dark and based on bullshit.

Terry Pratchett
Dark, Mushrooms, Bullshit
Terry Pratchett (2007). “Making Money”, Harper

Mere animals couldn’t possibly manage to act like this. You need to be a human being to be really stupid.

Terry Pratchett
Stupid, Animal, Pyramids
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Pyramids: (Discworld Novel 7)”, p.165, Random House

The trouble with life was that you didn’t get a chance to practice before doing it for real.

Terry Pratchett
Real, Practice, Chance
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Pyramids: (Discworld Novel 7)”, p.282, Random House

Where's the pleasure in bein' the winner if the loser ain't alive to know they've lost?

Terry Pratchett
Alive, Loser, Winner

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