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Terry Pratchett Quotes - Page 8

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Down there - he said - are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a

Down there - he said - are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a sort of mass-produced darkness of the soul. Sin, you might say, without a trace of originality. They accept evil not because they say yes, but because they don't say no.

Terry Pratchett
Dragons, People, Evil
"Guards! Guards!". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1989.

Cats will amusingly tolerate humans only until someone comes up with a tin opener that can be operated with a paw.

Terry Pratchett
Cat, Tin, Paws

Are you a devious, plotting, unreliable madman? Ah, good, then you can be my most trusted advisor.

Terry Pratchett
Advisors, Madmen, Interesting Times
"Interesting Times". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1994.

Always face what you fear. Have just enough money, never too much, and some string. Even if it’s not your fault, it’s your responsibility. Witches deal with things. Never stand between two mirrors. Never cackle. Do what you must do. Never lie, but you don’t always have to be honest. Never wish. Especially don’t wish upon a star, which is astronomically stupid. Open your eyes, and then open your eyes again.

Terry Pratchett
Stars, Lying, Stupid

Most horses don't walk backwards voluntarily, because what they can't see doesn't exist.

Terry Pratchett
Horse, Walks, Backwards

William: "I'm sure we can all pull together, sir." Vetinari: "Oh, I do hope not. Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions.

Terry Pratchett
Men, Together, Cooperation
"The Truth". Book by ‎Terry Pratchett, 2000.

There are, it has been said, two types of people in the world. There are those who, when presented with a glass that is exactly half full, say: this glass is half full. And then there are those who say: this glass is half empty. The world belongs, however, to those who can look at the glass and say: What's up with this glass? Excuse me? Excuse me? This is my glass? I don't think so. My glass was full! And it was a bigger glass! Who's been pinching my beer?

Terry Pratchett
Truth, Food, Beer

I can see we're going to get along like a house on fire," said Miss Tick. "There may be no survivors.

Terry Pratchett
Fire, Missing, House

but what should we do when the highborn and wealthy take to crime? Indeed, if a poor man will spend a year in prison for stealing out of hunger, how high would the gallows need to be to hang the rich man who breaks the law out of greed?

Terry Pratchett
Men, Years, Law
Terry Pratchett (2011). “Snuff: (Discworld Novel 39)”, p.19, Random House

You can't build a plot out of jokes. You need tragic relief. And you need to let people know that when a lot of frightened people are running around with edged weaponry, there are deaths. Stupid deaths, usually. I'm not writing 'The A-Team' - if there's a fight going on, people will get hurt. Not letting this happen would be a betrayal.

Terry Pratchett
Running, Hurt, Betrayal

Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along.

Terry Pratchett
Queens, Fate, Play
"Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

I try to make computers say things like You have 60 seconds to achieve safe distance.

Terry Pratchett
Distance, Trying, Safe

What have I always believed? That on the whole, and by and large, if a man lived properly, not according to what any priests said, but according to what seemed decent and honest inside, then it would, at the end, more or less, turn out all right.

Terry Pratchett
Men, Honest, Ends
FaceBook post by Terry Pratchett from Apr 17, 2016

I just rearrange words into a pleasing order for money.

Terry Pratchett
Order

Most modern fantasy just rearranges the furniture in Tolkien's attic.

Terry Pratchett
Furniture, Fantasy, Modern

Wisdom is one of the few things that looks bigger the further away it is.

Terry Pratchett
Looks, Bigger
"Witches Abroad" by Terry Pratchett, Harper Torch, (p. 32), August 2002.

Personal’s not the same as important. People just think it is.

Terry Pratchett
Thinking, People, Important
"Lords And Ladies". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1992.

I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?" Death thought about it. CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.

Terry Pratchett
Life, Death, Nice
Terry Pratchett (2017). “Terry Pratchett's Discworld Coloring Book”, p.42, Simon and Schuster

You are very clever," said the old man shyly. "I would like to eat your brains, one day.

Terry Pratchett
Clever, Men, Brain
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Nation”, p.342, Random House

All I am really promoting in the books is the Golden Rule, which I hope everybody knows to be "do as you would be done by." It has one or 2 flaws, but it is a good soundbite. Evil starts when you treat other people as things. There are perhaps worse crimes, but they begin when you treat other people as things.

Terry Pratchett
Book, People, Evil
Source: www.washingtonpost.com

I once absent-mindedly ordered Three Mile Island dressing in a restaurant and, with great presence of mind, they brought Thousand Island Dressing and a bottle of chili sauce.

Terry Pratchett
Presence Of Mind, Islands, Bottles

Be one of the crowd? It went against everything a wizard stood for, and a wizard would not stand for anything if he could sit down for it, but even sitting down, you had to stand out.

Terry Pratchett
Sitting Down, Wizards, Crowds

This looks like a job for inadvisably applied magic if ever I saw one.

Terry Pratchett
Jobs, Magic, Looks
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Making Money: (Discworld Novel 36)”, p.464, Random House

Some pirates achieved immortality by great deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great wealth. But the captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.

Terry Pratchett
Long Ago, Pirate, Dying
"The Colour of Magic". Book by ‎Terry Pratchett, 1983.

Sometimes it is better to light a flamethrower than curse the darkness.

Terry Pratchett
Light, Darkness, Ankh
Terry Pratchett (2008). “Men At Arms: (Discworld Novel 15)”, p.291, Random House

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