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Will Rogers Quotes about Funny

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There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Will Rogers
Funny, Reading, Learning
"The Manly Wisdom of Will Rogers". "Friars Club Bible of Jokes, Pokes, Roasts, and Toasts". Book by Nina Colman, p. 316, 2001.

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car.

Will Rogers
Funny, Death, Hilarious

I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Will Rogers
Funny, Sarcastic, Witty
In Saturday Review 25 Aug. 1962

I know worrying works, because none of the stuff I worried about ever happened.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Worry

There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

Will Rogers
Funny, Hilarious, Women

The trouble with practical jokes is that very often they get elected.

Will Rogers
Funny, Hilarious, Fools Day
Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

With Congress, every time they make a joke it's a law, and every time they make a law it's a joke.

Will Rogers
Funny, Humor, Law
Will Rogers, Bryan B. Sterling, Frances N. Sterling (1993). “Will Rogers' World: America's Foremost Political Humorist Comments on the Twenties and Thirties--and Eighties and Nineties”, p.50, Rowman & Littlefield

If you ever injected truth into politics you would have no politics.

Will Rogers
Funny, Truth, Political Will
Will Rogers, Bryan B. Sterling, Frances N. Sterling (1993). “Will Rogers' World: America's Foremost Political Humorist Comments on the Twenties and Thirties--and Eighties and Nineties”, p.150, Rowman & Littlefield

If you get to thinking you're a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else's dog around.

Will Rogers
Funny, Dog, Thinking

Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.

Will Rogers
Funny, Hilarious, Sarcastic
"Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

Common sense ain't common.

Will Rogers
Funny, Common Sense, Common

Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Life
"The Graduation Speech I'd Give, if Anyone Asked" by Karina Bland, www.azcentral.com. June 03, 2015.

Sometimes people deserve a high five, in the face, with a chair.

Will Rogers
Funny, People, Faces

I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

Will Rogers
Funny, Party, Political Will
"Will Rogers, Ambassador of Good Will, Prince of Wit and Wisdom". Book by Patrick Joseph O'Brien. Chapter 9, 1935.

Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Family
Norman Vincent Peale, Marjorie Holmes, Arthur Gordon, Will Rogers (1995). “To father, with love: wisdom from Guideposts”, Dimensions for Living

What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds.

Will Rogers
Funny, Country, Sarcasm
"Creative Leadership: Mining the Gold in Your Workforce". Book by A. S. Migs Damiani, p. 168, 1998.

The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Success

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Will Rogers
Funny, Leadership, Drinking
"The Manly Wisdom of Will Rogers". "Friars Club Bible of Jokes, Pokes, Roasts, and Toasts". Book by Nina Colman, p. 316, 2001.

Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

Will Rogers
Funny, Life, Change
Will Rogers, Bryan B. Sterling (1988). “The Will Rogers scrapbook”, Random House Value Publishing

The worst thing that happens to you may be the best thing for you if you don't let it get the best of you.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Adversity

A fool and his money are soon elected.

Will Rogers
Funny, Sarcastic, Money

It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you.

Will Rogers
Funny, Humor, Government

People who fly into a rage always make a bad landing.

Will Rogers
Inspirational, Funny, Crazy

If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?

Will Rogers
Funny, Witty, Humorous

The best way to make a fire with two sticks is to make sure one of them is a match.

Will Rogers
Funny, Humor, Two

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