Fun Quotes - Page 102

Television – a medium. So called because it is neither rare nor well done.

In my world, everyone's a pony and they all eat rainbows and poop butterflies!

Controversial issues are always more interesting but I don't create material about a subject I have opinion on just because it's controversial. The most fun is having a point of view that the audience is generally against and presenting an argument that challenges their thinking.

I am about to - or I am going to - die; either expression is correct.

The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations.

Sometimes, when I'm feeling down because nothing seems to be going right, I like to take a home pregnancy test. Then I can say, 'Hey, at least I'm not pregnant.'

Take every opportunity that comes your way and most importantly have fun with it.

A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones.

A woman has to be intelligent, have charm, a sense of humor, and be kind. It's the same qualities I require from a man.

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

Marriage is a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose.

The further you get away from yourself, the more challenging it is. Not to be in your comfort zone is great fun.

Fundamentals are right down to earth. And one fundamental is: You have to make calls. Nothing happens until you make a call. It’s that fundamental!

Because there are no fours.

One out of four people in this country is mentally unbalanced. Think of your three closest friends; if they seem OK, then you're the one.

I actually started to think a lot about the difference between a creative gesture and a noncreative gesture. I decided that all gestures were creative. Because you always have to make a decision at some point.

Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows.

Most people ignore most poetry because most poetry ignores most people.

Fast is only cool if it's melodic and has substance.

Oh, insomnia! Ah, well, I know a good cure for it... Get plenty of sleep.

Every time I hear the name Joe Louis my nose starts to bleed.

I look at the NBA as a football game without the helmet.

I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world... perhaps you've seen it.

As with most fine things, chocolate has its season. There is a simple memory aid that you can use to determine whether it is the correct time to order chocolate dishes: any month whose name contains the letter A, E, or U is the proper time for chocolate.

As for lawyers, it's more fun to play one than to be one.