Witty Quotes - Page 34

The discovery of the good taste of bad taste can be very liberating. The man who insists on high and serious pleasures is depriving himself of pleasure; he continually restricts what he can enjoy; in the constant exercise of his good taste he will eventually price himself out of the market, so to speak. Here Camp taste supervenes upon good taste as a daring and witty hedonism. It makes the man of good taste cheerful, where before he ran the risk of being chronically frustrated. It is good for the digestion.

Tell them to stand closer apart.

As I may or may not say to the Lord on Judgment Day, "You ask a lot of questions for someone who has so much explaining to do"

A wise saying is something you keep picking up off the floor in front of your fridge

There's a limit to how many times you can read how great you are and what an inspiration you are, but I'm not there yet.

The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop.

I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world.

I think it would be a good idea.

I saw what a mess a lot of people could make of their lives when they're smitten. Some of them go temporarily insane. They find a person who they think holds the key to their happiness-the only key to their happiness... My work has always been my greatest happiness

I made myself platinum, but I was born a dirty blonde.

I've been things and seen places.

I don't even know if it's possible, but if it were, I'd like to make those kinds of old movies where the women were articulate and intelligent and flawed and witty.

School is where you go between when your parents can't take you and industry can't take you.

The more learned and witty you bee, the more fit to act for Satan will you bee.

Never feel remorse for what you have thought about your wife; she has thought much worse things about you.

I'm kidding about having only a few dollars. I might have a few dollars more.

I've no idea where ideas come from and I hope I never find out; it would spoil the excitement for me if it turned out I just have a funny little wrinkle on the surface of my brain which makes me think about invisible train platforms.

Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny.

Come on in girls, and leave all hope behind.

Most young women do not welcome promiscuous advances. (Either that, or my luck's terrible.)

She's so in love with me, she doesn't know anything. That's why she's in love with me.

Years ago, I tried to top everybody, but I don't anymore. I realized it was killing conversation. When you're always trying for a topper you aren't really listening. It ruins communication

It's never just a game when you're winning.

Not only do I not know what's going on, I wouldn't know what to do about it if I did.

A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic.