Erma Bombeck Quotes about Mom

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When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.

When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out.

Erma Bombeck

Funny, Family, Mom

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.

Erma Bombeck

Family, Mom, Mother

Erma Bombeck (2013). “Motherhood: The Second Oldest Profession”, p.10, Open Road Media

Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it's still snowing.

Erma Bombeck

Mom, Children, Home

It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have...One pair that see through closed doors. Another in the back of her head...and, of course, the ones in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and reflect 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word.

Erma Bombeck

Mom, Mother, Children

Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.

Erma Bombeck

Mom, Mother, Years

My second favorite household chore is ironing. My first being hitting my head on the top bunk bed until I faint.

Erma Bombeck

Family, Mom, Mother

Erma Bombeck (2011). “I Lost Everything in the Post-Natal Depression”, p.96, Fawcett

Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.

Erma Bombeck

Mom, Mother, White

When your mother asks, 'Do you want a piece of advice?' it is a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.

Erma Bombeck

Inspirational, Mothers Day, Mom

Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put 'I love Mom' on the license plate.

Erma Bombeck

Funny, Family, Mom