Erma Bombeck Quotes about Home

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Someday, when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates a mother, I'll tell them: I loved you enough to bug you about where you were going, with whom and what time you would get home. ... I loved

Someday, when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates a mother, I'll tell them: I loved you enough to bug you about where you were going, with whom and what time you would get home. ... I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover your friend was a creep. I loved you enough to make you return a Milky Way with a bite out of it to a drugstore and confess, 'I stole this.' ... But most of all I loved you enough to say no when you hated me for it. That was the hardest part of all.

Erma Bombeck

Mother, Children, Home

Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it's still snowing.

Erma Bombeck

Mom, Children, Home

Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were buried with their spices. I know which one I'm taking with me when I go.

Erma Bombeck

Home, Forever, Spices

When you look like your passport photo, it's time to go home.

Erma Bombeck

Travel, Home, Humor

Erma Bombeck (1997). “Forever, Erma: Best-Loved Writing From America's Favorite Humorist”, p.2, Andrews McMeel Publishing

Most mothers entering the labor market outside the home are naive. They stagger home each evening, holding mail in their teeth, the cleaning over their arm, a lamb chop defrosting under each armpit, balancing two gallons of frozen milk between their knees, and expect one of the kids to get the door.

Erma Bombeck

Mother, Home, Kids

You show me a boy who brings a snake home to his mother and I'll show you an orphan.

Erma Bombeck

Mother, Home, Boys

Some say the antique syndrome surfaced to offset the newness of the land, the homes, and the settlers. Some say the interest was initiated by a desire to return to the roots of yesterday. I contend the entire movement to acquire antiques was born out of sheer respect of things that lasted longer than fifteen minutes.

Erma Bombeck

Home, Roots, Yesterday

Erma Bombeck (2013). “The Grass Is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank”, p.26, Open Road Media

You become about as exciting as your food blender. The kids come in, look you in the eye, and ask if anybody's home.

Erma Bombeck

Children, Home, Kids