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Mark Twain Quotes - Page 82

All Quotes 4th Of July Accomplishment Achievement Addiction Adventure Adversity Age Aging Alcohol Ambition Anxiety Appearance Appreciation Arguing Army Arrogance Art Atheism Atheist Attitude Authority Balance Beauty Beer Being Alone Belief Bible Bitterness Blame Bliss Bravery Business Censorship Challenges Change Character Charity Chastity Children Christianity Church Coffee College Comedy Communication Community Compassion Confidence Conflict Conscience Conservatism Constitution Cooking Country Courage Crime Criticism Dance Dancing Darkness Death Deception Defeat Democracy Design Desire Determination Devil Disappointment Diversity Divorce Doubt Drinking Duty Dying Earth Education Effort Encouragement Energy Enthusiasm Envy Epic Ethics Evidence Evil Exercise Experience Failing Failure Family Fashion Fear Feelings Fighting Finding Yourself Fitness Flattery Focus Food Forgiveness Free Speech Freedom Friends Friendship Fun Funeral Funny Future Genius Getting Older Giving Giving Up God Gold Good Times Gossip Grace Graduation Gratitude Greatness Greed Grief Grieving Growing Up Growth Happiness Happy Hard Times Hard Work Hate Healing Health Heart Heaven Hell Hilarious Hills Hinduism History Holiday Home Honesty Honor House Human Nature Humanity Humility Hunger Hunting Hurt Hypocrisy Ignorance Imagination Independence Individuality Innovation Insanity Inspiration Inspirational Inspiring Integrity Intelligence Journey Joy Judgement Judging Judgment Justice Kindness Knowledge Labor Language Laughter Law Of Attraction Leadership Learning Liars Liberty Life Life And Death Literature Loneliness Losing Loss Love Loyalty Luck Lying Madness Manners Marriage Math Memorial Day Memories Military Moderation Modesty Mom Monarchy Money Moon Morality Morning Motivation Motivational Mountain Music Nature New Year Office Opportunity Optimism Pain Parenting Passion Past Patriotism Peace Perception Perfection Perseverance Personality Philosophy Planning Pleasure Politics Positive Positive Thinking Positivity Poverty Power Praise Prayer Preaching Prejudice Pride Privacy Profanity Progress Prophecy Prosperity Purpose Quality Rain Reading Reading Books Reality Recovery Regret Religion Reputation Respect Responsibility Revolution Risk Running Sad Sadness Sailing Salvation Sanity Sarcasm Satan School Science Self Esteem Seven Shame Silence Simplicity Sin Skins Sleep Smoking Society Solitude Son Sorrow Soul Sports Spring Strength Struggle Study Stupidity Style Success Suffering Summer Sunday Sunshine Swimming Talent Taxes Teaching Temperance Temptation Time Today Trade Tradition Tragedy Training Travel Trust Truth Twins Undertaker Vacation Values Violence Virtue Vision Vocation Voting Waiting War Water Wealth Whiskey Wife Wine Winning Winter Wisdom Wit Work Worry Worship Writing Youth

Women cannot receive even the most palpably judicious suggestion without arguing it; that is, married women.

Women cannot receive even the most palpably judicious suggestion without arguing it; that is, married women.

Suggestions, Arguing, Married

Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.516, Courier Corporation

The writing begins when you’ve finished. Only then do you know what you’re trying to say.

Writing, Trying, Knows

If there wasn't anything to find out, it would be dull. Even trying to find out and not finding out is just as interesting as trying to find out and finding out; and I don't know but more so.

Discovery, Interesting, Trying

Mark Twain (2001). “How Nancy Jackson Married Kate Wilson and Other Tales of Rebellious Girls & Daring Young Women”, p.194, U of Nebraska Press

This editor is a critic. He has pulled out his carving-knife and his tomahawk and is starting after a book which he is going to have for breakfast.

Book, Knives, Editors

Mark Twain (2016). “What Is Man? And Other Essays”, p.98, Xist Publishing

That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.

Editors, Clothes, Sitting

Mark Twain (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Mark Twain (Illustrated)”, p.3989, Delphi Classics

If we could imagine such a man, that is a man who could invent the fly and send him out on his mission and furnish him with his orders: Depart into the uttermost corners of the earth and, diligently do your appointed work. Persecute the sick child, settle upon its eyes, its face, its hands, and gnaw and pester and sting, worry and fret and madden the worn and tried mother who watches by the child and humbly prays for mercy and relief with the pathetic faith of the deceived and the unteachable.

Mother, Children, Eye

Heaven is the very last place to come to rest and don't you be afraid to bet on that!

Heaven, Religion, Lasts

Mark Twain (2013). “Extract from Captain Stormfield's Visit to Heaven”, p.20, Baen Publishing Enterprises

It is plain that there is one moral law for heaven and another for the earth. The pulpit assures us that wherever we see suffering and sorrow, which we can relieve and do not, we sin, heavily. There was never yet a case of suffering or sorrow which God could not relieve. Does He sin then?

Law, Heaven, Suffering

Mark Twain, John Sutton Tuckey (1980). “The Devil's Race-track: Mark Twain's Great Dark Writings : the Best from Which was the Dream? and Fables of Man”, p.21, Univ of California Press

As for the dinosaur - But Noah's conscience was easy; it was not named in his cargo list and he and the boys were not aware that there was such a creature. He said he could not blame himself for not knowing about the dinosaur, because it was an American animal and America had not then been discovered.

Animal, Boys, Knowing

Mark Twain (2017). “MARK TWAIN Ultimate Collection: 370+ Titles in One Volume (Illustrated): The Adventures of Tom Sawyer & Huckleberry Finn, The Prince and the Pauper, The £1,000,000 Bank Note, A Horse’s Tale, Yankee in King Arthur's Court, The Innocents Abroad, Life on the Mississippi…”, p.5018, e-artnow

More than two hundred death penalties are gone from the law books, but the [biblical] texts that authorised them remain.

Book, Biblical, Law

We have an insanity plea that would have saved Cain.

Law, Insanity, Cain

Address on the 4th of July, delivered 4 July 1899, London, England

The laws of Nature, that is to say the laws of God, plainly made every human being a law unto himself, we must steadfastly refuse to obey those laws, and we must as steadfastly stand by the conventions which ignore them, since the statutes furnish us peace, fairly good government, and stability, and therefore are better for us than the laws of God, which would soon plunge us into confusion and disorder and anarchy if we should adopt them.

Government, Law, Confusion

Mark Twain (1973). “Mark Twain and the three R's: race, religion, revolution--and related matters”, Bobbs-Merrill Company

...the administration of the law can never go lax where every individual sees to it that it grows not lax in his own case, or in cases which fall under his eyes.

Fall, Eye, Law

Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.230, Courier Corporation

The laws of Nature take precedence of all human laws. The purpose of all human laws is one - to defeat the laws of Nature. This is the case among all the nations, both civilized and savage. It is a grotesquerie, but when the human race is not grotesque it is because it is asleep and losing its opportunity.

Opportunity, Race, Law

Mark Twain (2013). “Autobiography of Mark Twain”, p.127, Univ of California Press

The banging and slamming and booming and crashing were something beyond belief. [On Lohengrin]

Opera, Belief, Banging

Mark Twain (2015). “A Tramp Abroad: Mark Twain's Collections”, p.29, 谷月社

The cigar-box which the European calls a 'lift' needs but to be compared with our elevators to be appreciated. The lift stops to reflect between floors. That is all right in a hearse, but not in elevators. The American elevator acts like a man's patent purge-it works.

Science, Men, Europe

Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.98, Courier Corporation

Wisdom teaches us that none but birds should go out early, and that not even birds should do it unless they are out of worms.

Bird, Should, Worms

Mark Twain, Bernard Taper (1963). “Mark Twain's San Francisco”, p.186, Heyday

Next you'd see a raft sliding by, away off yonder, and maybe a galoot on it chopping. . . you'd see the ax flash and come down-you don't hear nothing; you see the ax go up again, and by the time it's above the man's head then you hear the k'chunk!-it had took all that time to come over the water.

Math, Science, Men

Mark Twain, General Press (2016). “The Complete Works of Mark Twain: All 13 Novels, Short Stories, Poetry and Essays”, p.475, GENERAL PRESS

I am trying to get the hang of this new fangled writing machine, but I am not making a shining success of it. However, this is the first attempt I have ever made & yet I perceive I shall soon & easily acquire a fine facility in its use. ... The machine has several virtues. I believe it will print faster than I can write. One may lean back in his chair & work it. It piles an awful stack of words on one page. It don't muss things or scatter ink blots around. Of course it saves paper.

Believe, Writing, Typewriters

By "trampling upon the helpless abroad" with unchecked surveillance, Americans have learned, "by a natural process, to endure with apathy the like at home."

Home, Tyrants, Apathy

Sagebrush is a very fair fuel, but as a vegetable it is a distinguished failure. Nothing can abide the taste of it but the jackass and his illegitimate child the mule.

Children, Vegetables, Fuel

Mark Twain (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Mark Twain (Illustrated)”, p.4619, Delphi Classics

That reminds me to remark, in passing, that the very first official thing I did, in my administration-and it was on the first day of it, too-was to start a patent office; for I knew that a country without a patent office and good patent laws was just a crab, and couldn't travel any way but sideways or backways.

Country, Science, Law

Mark Twain (2012). “Three by Twain: Tom Sawyer, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, and A Connecticut Yankee In King Arther's Court”, p.63, Graphic Arts Books

No one can tell me what is a good cigar - for me. I am the only judge. People who claim to know say that I smoke the worst cigars in the world. They bring their own cigars when they come to my house.

Judging, People, House

Mark Twain (2013). “Delphi Complete Works of Mark Twain (Illustrated)”, p.4052, Delphi Classics

For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.

Christian, Children, Littles

The heart is the real fountain of youth.

Real, Heart, Youth

Mark Twain, Caroline Thomas Harnsberger (2009). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.530, Courier Corporation

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