Jokes Quotes - Page 9

Patriotism is a joke in the UK.

Jokes are unanswerable objections.

You don't make stupid jokes in art.

I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny.

You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble.

Then when we did the untitled record, we just didn't feel like putting joke stuff on it, so we didn't. It wasn't really a deliberation or a real introspective thing like, "Are we going to joke on this one, are we not going to joke on this one?" We just didn't feel like it on the untitled one, so we didn't.

I don't think any of us felt like, "Oh, we need to put joke songs on the record." If we found something funny, we would record it, and if we wanted to, we'd put it on the record. It's not really something we spent too much time agonizing over.

I like to respond with jokes and to keep it as light as possible.

I could never make a joke about somebody unless I could say it to their face and they'd laugh.

Is anything wrong, dear? the old joke went. No, why? You moved. Just don't move.

I like to joke that Inhofe is as far left as I'll go for an employer.

I could never sit down and write jokes.

Only the saints would joke so about the gods, because it was either joke or scream, and they alone knew it was all the same to the gods.

A lot of comics just joke around, but it's just as important to get the truth out there.

I'm not a great joke writer, which is odd for a comic to say, but I'm not.

His whole personality was like an elaborate joke that he never stopped telling.

I had to keep the text pretty spare compared to what I would typically do in a picture book. My picture books have a lot of little jokes and asides that aren't necessarily part of the main story.

For every ten jokes you acquire a hundred enemies.

My friends joke that I’m dead until I get onstage. I’m dead right now as you’re speaking to me.

Living is a pretty grim joke, but a joke just the same.

Everything about life is a joke. Don't you know that?

That's what my books are, now that I'm a grownup - mosaics of jokes.

A joke is like building a mousetrap from scratch. You have to work pretty hard to make the thing snap when it is supposed to snap.

You're basically on set to help the production. You're helping the actors make it make sense, or maybe you wrote something that doesn't work in the production sense. Most of it is coming up with jokes.

Why can't women tell jokes? Because we marry them!