Sarcastic Quotes - Page 22

He was distinguished for ignorance; for he had only one idea, and that was wrong.

I've had them both, and I don't think much of either.

Why have computers? Politicians are far more calculating.

Seeing a murder on television can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.

You're a mouse studying to be a rat.

If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of the doubt.

She was what we used to call a suicide blonde - dyed by her own hand.

Neither irony or sarcasm is argument.

People seem to enjoy things more when they know a lot of other people have been left out of the pleasure.

It’s not enough to be able to lie with a straight face; anybody with enough gall to raise on a busted flush can do that. The first way to lie artistically is to tell the truth — but not all of it. The second way involves telling the truth, too, but is harder: Tell the exact truth and maybe all of it…but tell it so unconvincingly that your listener is sure you are lying.

Most turkeys taste better the day after; my mother's tasted better the day before.

Percy smiled at her - that sarcastic troublemaker smile that had annoyed her for years but eventually had become endearing. His sea-green eyes were as gorgeous as she remembered. His dark hair was swept to one side, like he'd just come from a walk on the beach. He looked even better than he had six months ago - tanner and taller, leaner and more muscular. Percy threw his arms around her. They kissed and for a moment nothing else mattered. An asteroid could have hit the planet and wiped out all life, and Annabeth wouldn't have cared.

The English have a miraculous power of turning wine into water.

The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream.

Sometimes I say things that I think are obviously sarcastic and people take them quite literally.

Getting married is like trading in the adoration of many for the sarcasm of one.

Post-​wounded women know that postures of pain play into limited and outmoded conceptions of womanhood. Their hurt has a new native language spoken in several dialects: sarcastic, jaded, opaque; cool and clever. They guard against those moments when melodrama or self-​pity might split their careful seams of intellect, expose the shame of self-​absorption without self-​awareness.

When I see a man of shallow understanding extravagantly clothed, I feel sorry - for the clothes.

He knew everything about literature except how to enjoy it.

He never said a foolish thing nor never did a wise one.

When we hold a World Championship for a particular sport, we invite teams from other countries to play as well.

As we celebrate Recovery Month, it is time for Congress to knock down the barriers to treatment and recovery for 26 million Americans suffering the ravages of alcohol and drug addiction.

A house is never still in darkness to those who listen intently; there is a whispering in distant chambers, an unearthly hand presses the snib of the window, the latch rises. Ghosts were created when the first man awoke in the night.

Death and taxes may be inevitable, but they shouldn't be related.

Pushing forty? She's hanging on for dear life.