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Mark Twain Quotes - Page 18

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In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language.

In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language.

Mark Twain
Funny, Humorous, Eye
Mark Twain (2008). “The Innocents Abroad”, p.645, Velvet Element Books

Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

Mark Twain
Inspirational, Strength, Happiness
The Mysterious Stranger ch. 10 (1916)

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.

Mark Twain
Inspirational, Success, Smart
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.210, Courier Corporation

It takes your enemy and your friend, working together, to hurt you to the heart: the one to slander you and the other to get the news to you.

Mark Twain
Friendship, Hurt, Heart
Following the Equator ch. 45, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's New Calendar" (1897)

The weakest of all weak things is a virtue that has not been tested in the fire.

Mark Twain
Art, Fire, Virtue
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.496, Courier Corporation

A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.

Mark Twain
Inspirational, Success, Education

Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.

Mark Twain
Respectful, Be Respectful, Ifs
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.4, Courier Corporation

The partitions of the houses were so thin we could hear the women occupants of adjoining rooms changing their minds.

Mark Twain
House, Mind, Rooms
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.500, Courier Corporation

Preachers are always pleasant company when they are off duty.

Mark Twain
Duty, Preacher, Company
Mark Twain (1976). “Mark Twain's Notebooks & Journals, Volume I: (1855-1873)”, p.303, Univ of California Press

It is a gratification to me to know that I am ignorant of art... Because people who understand art find nothing in pictures but blemishes.

Mark Twain
Art, People, Ignorant
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.13, Courier Corporation

Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. You cannot eliminate habits that no longer serve you. You can only replace them with new habits that support your goals. Moment by moment, you need to live with awareness and structure the habits that you include or exclude in your days.

Mark Twain
Inspirational Life, Men, Goal

Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.

Mark Twain
Inspiration, Civilization, History
"Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist".

So far as I am able to judge, nothing has been left undone, either by man or nature, to make India the most extraordinary country that the sun visits on his rounds. Nothing seems to have been forgotten, nothing overlooked.

Mark Twain
Country, Men, Judging
Mark Twain (1809). “The Writings of Mark Twain: Following the equator; a journey around the world”, p.243

The problem with education is school.

Mark Twain
School, Problem

To get the right word in the right place is a rare achievement. To condense the diffused light of a page of thought into the luminous flash of a single sentence, is worthy to rank as a prize composition just by itself...Anybody can have ideas--the difficulty is to express them without squandering a quire of paper on an idea that ought to be reduced to one glittering paragraph.

Mark Twain
Writing, Light, Ideas

Too bad that youth is wasted on the young.

Mark Twain
Youth, Young

You cant reach old age by another man's road, my habits protect my life but they would assassinate you

Mark Twain
Men, Age, Habit
Mark Twain, Milton Meltzer (2002). “Mark Twain Himself: A Pictorial Biography”, p.266, University of Missouri Press

What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.

Mark Twain
Real, Literature, Littles
Mark Twain, Harriet Elinor Smith (2012). “Autobiography of Mark Twain: Reader's Edition”, p.44, Univ of California Press

In America-as elsewhere-free speech is confined to the dead.

Mark Twain
Religious, America, Speech
Mark Twain (194?). “Mark Twain's notebook”

Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.

Mark Twain
Book, Somewhere Else, People

Buy land, they're not making it anymore.

Mark Twain
Inspiration, Land, Estates
Mark Twain (2014). “Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist”, p.53, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse.

Mark Twain
Men, Light, Heaven
"Mark Twain's notebook".

In a museum in Havana, there are two skulls of Christopher Columbus, one when he was a boy and one when he was a man

Mark Twain
Boys, Men, Museums
Mark Twain (2012). “Mark Twain at Your Fingertips: A Book of Quotations”, p.60, Courier Corporation

For the majority of us, the past is a regret, the future an experiment

Mark Twain
Regret, Future, Past
Mark Twain (2014). “Mark Twain on Common Sense: Timeless Advice and Words of Wisdom from America's Most-Revered Humorist”, p.6, Skyhorse Publishing, Inc.

Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.

Mark Twain
Life, Happiness, Obscurity
Mark Twain (2015). “Bite-Size Twain: Wit and Wisdom from the Literary Legend”, p.27, St. Martin's Press

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