Authors:

A
B
C
D
E
F
G
H
I
J
K
L
M
N
O
P
Q
R
S
T
U
V
W
X
Y
Z

P. J. ORourke Quotes - Page 24

All Quotes Addiction Alcohol Appearance Art Authority Boat Cancer Capitalism Caring Character Charity Children Church Coffee College Comedy Communism Cooking Country Culture Dating Death Debate Democracy Divorce Drinking Dying Earth Effort Environment Exercise Family Fashion Food Free Market Fun Funny Giving Golf Growth Health Heart Heaven History Home House Inspirational Journalism Killing Language Liberalism Liberty Life Loss Love Luck Lying Mom Money Morning Office Past Pleasure Politics Pollution Poverty Purpose Quality Reading Responsibility Running Sailing Satire School Sloth Smoking Socialism Sports Students Stupidity Style Taxes Trade Virtue Waiting War Wealth Wife Wine Worry Writing

I'm a rather decisive type.

I'm a rather decisive type.

Type

Happy hour is slightly different in the Soviet Union. There are no ice cubes or orange-peel twists in the vodka. Also, it lasts all day.

War, Ice, Orange

Fiscal conservatism is just an easy way to express something that is a bit more difficult, which is that the size and scope of government, and really the size and scope of politics in our lives, has grown uncomfortable, unwieldy, intrusive and inefficient.

Government, Way, Size

"PJ O'Rourke - the rightwinger it's OK for lefties to like". Interview with Paul Harris, www.theguardian.com. October 29, 2010.

You'll note that politicians no longer spend money, they invest it. Don't worry about paying more to the [IRS]. You aren't being taxed; you're taking a plunge on a fly-by-night stock issue.

Night, Issues, Worry

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Parliament of Whores: A Lone Humorist Attempts to Explain the Entire U.S. Government”, p.19, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

Gambling is so pervasive in Nevada that maybe the state should just go the whole hog. There'd be gum machines that dispensed chewing tobacco if you lost. You could gamble for the toilet paper in public bathroom stalls. And fill out Keno cards in an attempt to win cancer therapy at the hospital.

Cancer, Winning, Gambling

Whenever people tell you they are going to wipe the slate clean, it's your slate they mean to wipe.

Mean, People, Wipe

P.J. O'Rourke (2010). “DON'T VOTE - It Just Encourages the Bastards”, p.52, Atlantic Books Ltd

Jesse Jackson was spending time with his family, or families.

Spending Time, Spending

That happy sense of purpose people have when standing up for a principle they haven't really been knocked down for yet.

People, Principles, Purpose

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Give War a Chance: Eyewitness Accounts of Mankind's Struggle Against Tyranny, Injustice, and Alcohol-Free Beer”, p.80, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

Greatest generation came through some stuff that we can't even imagine - the Depression, World War I - and all they wanted after that was a breather and a calm and a quiet life, and they get us.

War, Generations, World

Source: www.pbs.org

At Epcot Center the Disney corporation has focused its attention on two things greatly in need of Disneyfication: the tedious future and the annoying whole wide world.

Funny, Humor, Two

P.J. O'Rourke (2012). “Holidays in Hell”, p.157, Atlantic Books Ltd

I think Michael O'Donoghue felt he'd said what he wanted to say. In fact, nobody thought we could spin it out long enough to make a book.

Book, Thinking, Long

Source: www.avclub.com

I can think of a number of areas in New York where three acres of nuclear waste would make the neighborhood safer to walk around in than it is now, and better lit.

Funny, New York, Humorous

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “All the Trouble in the World: The Lighter Side of Overpopulation, Famine, Ecological Disaster, Ethnic Hatred, Plague, and Poverty”, p.158, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

Self-interest leads to honing your skills, the better to trade with.

Self, Skills, Interest

Adam Smith's huge failure was the fact that he did not foresee the industrial revolution.

Revolution, Facts, Adam

When I get in deep water, I prefer to announce that I'm in over my head.

Deep Water, Water

Source: www.avclub.com

Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue.

Children, Divorce, Pawns

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Modern Manners: An Etiquette Book for Rude People”, p.123, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

This country is so urbanized we think low-fat milk comes from cows on Nutri/System weight-loss plans.

Funny, Country, Humorous

P. J. O'Rourke (2015). “Thrown Under the Omnibus: A Reader”, p.252, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

I think it's been hard for people to understand how Islam can be a good religion, and yet the Islamists are evil. Those of us who have had experience with Islam understand this, just as we understand the difference between snake handlers and people going to church on Sunday morning.

Morning, Sunday, Thinking

Interview with Colin Powell, www.theatlantic.com. September, 2004.

Southern California is a nice place, if you could cut out the show-business cancer. It just keeps spreading.

Nice, Cancer, Cutting

Interview with Gregg LaGambina, www.avclub.com. July 16, 2009.

What about snipers?" I once asked someone. He said, "Oh, most of the snipers have automatic weapon. They arent very accurate.

History, Historical, Weapons

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Republican Party Reptile: The Confessions, Adventures, Essays and (Other) Outrages of P.J. O'Rourke”, p.146, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

One of the things that makes me a conservative, or a libertarian, or whatever the heck it is that I am - a person who doesn't much like big government - is that I do not like the concentration of the power.

Government, Libertarian, Conservative

It is important to remember when reading Adam Smith or even when just thinking about Smith that the era that he lived in, we're not talking about poverty in a day when it meant not enough bedrooms for the kids, an old car, a black and white television. We're talking about a whole world where poverty meant not enough to eat.

Reading, Kids, Black And White

The Harvard Lampoon itself, which had a pretty stellar run in the '60s.

Running, Stellar, Harvard

Source: www.avclub.com

If a journalist shows a facility for praise he's liable to be offered a job in public relations or advertising and the next thing you know he's got a big office, a huge salary and is living in a fine home with a lovely wife and swell kids - another career blown to hell.

Funny, Jobs, Home

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Give War a Chance: Eyewitness Accounts of Mankind's Struggle Against Tyranny, Injustice, and Alcohol-Free Beer”, p.41, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

In Washington journalists can afford to live almost as well as people who work for a living.

Funny, People, Journalism

P. J. O'Rourke (2007). “Parliament of Whores: A Lone Humorist Attempts to Explain the Entire U.S. Government”, p.36, Grove/Atlantic, Inc.

You May Also Like: