Witty Quotes - Page 29

The wicked at heart probably know something.

I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

Fashions have done more harm than revolutions.

There are truths of which I have an inkling, but of most I have only a pencilling

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

It's all right for a perfect stranger to kiss your hand as long as he's perfect.

Men are my hobby, if I ever got married I'd have to give it up.

You see much more of your children once they leave home.

It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes

Would you consider a man or a woman to be complicated? Is it that difficult to understand both the sexes? We say that we know what the other sex is all about, but is that really true? Perhaps the following witty, funny quotes and sayings can help simplify things down about men.

Practical politics consists in ignoring facts.

University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small.

Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo.

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'.

It's much simpler to be tortured on camera or to be filmed losing your mind. Whereas a script that has characters who are honest, witty and genuine is often much harder to act.

A large nose is in fact the sign of an affable man, good, courteous, witty, liberal, courageous, such as I am.

I love people; it's mankind I can't stand.

Democracy arises out of the notion that those who are equal in any respect are equal in all respects; because men are equally free, they claim to be absolutely equal.

Bores can be divided into two classes; those who have their own particular subject, and those who do not need a subject.

A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention.

I have an existential map. It has 'You are here' written all over it.

The best thing about humour is that it shows people they are not alone.

Put it out of your mind. In no time, it will be a forgotten memory.

Hatred is blind, as well as love.

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.