Witty Quotes - Page 7

Government 'help' to business is just as disastrous as government persecution... the only way a government can be of service to national prosperity is by keeping its hands off.

But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near.

Censorship is telling a man he can't have a steak just because a baby can't chew it.

I used to be Snow White, but I drifted.

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Isn’t making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

The physician can bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise his clients to plant vines.

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer.

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle.

There is nothing - absolutely nothing - half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats.

All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.

Vote early and vote often.

Confidence is what you have before you understand the problem.

The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, the more you've got to admit that each party is worse than the other.

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since.

Seduction is about intelligence and wit. Someone who makes me laugh has every chance to seduce me.

Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite.

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

You will notice that what we are aiming at when we fall in love is a very strange paradox. The paradox consists of the fact that, when we fall in love, we are seeking to re-find all or some of the people to whom we were attached as children. On the other hand, we ask our beloved to correct all of the wrongs that these early parents or siblings inflicted upon us. So that love contains in it the contradiction: The attempt to return to the past and the attempt to undo the past.

Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis.

I don't at all like knowing what people say of me behind my back. It makes me far too conceited.

Like all sciences and all valuations, the psychology of women has hitherto been considered only from the point of view of men.

Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense.

Conversation should be pleasant without scurrility, witty without affectation, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel without falsehood.

One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.