Sarcastic Quotes - Page 14

We are a nation of sheep, and someone else owns the grass.

She had a pretty gift for quotation, which is a serviceable substitute for wit.

The trouble with children is that they're not returnable.

However low a man sinks he never reaches the level of the police.

Sisters don't need words. They have perfected a language of snarls and smiles and frowns and winks - expressions of shocked surprise and incredulity and disbelief. Sniffs and snorts and gasps and sighs - that can undermine any tale you're telling.

I don't recognize you - I've changed a lot.

Avoid using cigarettes, alcohol, and drugs as alternatives to being an interesting person.

I'm a woman of very few words, but lots of action.

Those who are easily shocked should be shocked more often.

Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.

America makes prodigious mistakes, America has colossal faults, but one thing cannot be denied: America is always on the move. She may be going to Hell, of course, but at least she isn't standing still.

He is brilliant - to the top of his boots.

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters.

Romance has been elegantly defined as the offspring of fiction and love.

His ignorance is encyclopedic.

German in the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747.

Be careful not to do your good deeds when there's no one watching you.

The lead singer of Creed says he won’t endorse President Obama. Well that settles it -- Obama will not win the 1998 presidential election.

It's a sort of piss-take on culture, because a drag queen is a clown - a parody of our society. It's a sarcastic spoof on culture, which allows us to laugh at ourselves - but in a way that is inclusive of everyone.

If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.

It is after you have lost your teeth that you can afford to buy steaks.

Only the shallow know themselves.

Don't give a woman advice; one should never give a woman anything she can't wear in the evening.

Sarcasm helps me overcome the harshness of the reality we live, eases the pain of scars and makes people smile.

I've no time for broads who want to rule the world alone. Without men, who'd do up the zipper on the back of your dress?