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George Carlin Quotes - Page 38

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The fact that I didn't finish school left me with a lifelong need to prove that I'm smart, prove it to myself, maybe to the world. I [also] needed to be - not the center of attention - but I needed to be able to attract

The fact that I didn't finish school left me with a lifelong need to prove that I'm smart, prove it to myself, maybe to the world. I [also] needed to be - not the center of attention - but I needed to be able to attract attention when I wanted it, through my stunts and my fooling around physically with faces or postures or voices I would do. Those things are important elements in the drive behind all of this [my career].

Smart, School, Careers

Source: www.psychologytoday.com

In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! - I hope I'll be safe at home!

Baseball, Home, Safe

George Carlin (2007). “The Best of Brain Droppings”, p.44, Peter Pauper Press, Inc.

If a drug has anything going for it at all, it should be self-limiting. It should tell you when you've had enough.

Self, Drug, Going For It

Interview with Sam Merrill, reprints.longform.org. January 1982.

In some hotels they give you a little sewing kit. You know what I do? I sew the towels together. One time I sewed a button on a lampshade. I like to leave a mark.

Giving, Together, Buttons

Anyone who's onstage is going to attract a certain number of misguided people. But I was never very interested in groupies. Instead of thinking about the sex, I'd always think about the clap and the crabs those people have.

Sex, Thinking, Numbers

Interview with Sam Merrill, reprints.longform.org. January 1982.

Sometimes, after I'd gone at the coke like one of those snow plows moving up First Avenue, I'd think my heart was over on the dresser, pounding, and I was watching it. I asked some of the doctors who drifted through the intensive-care unit what kind of effect total cocaine abuse has on the heart and they said things like, "Well, there's not enough valid information...." That kind of answer.

Moving, Heart, Thinking

Source: reprints.longform.org

I'd go on runs [on cocaine ], four and five days without sleep. Then I'd crash and sleep about 18 hours a day for seven to ten days. Then it would take a few more weeks to get over a vague sort of depression. Then I'd be off on another run.

Running, Sleep, Goes On

Source: reprints.longform.org

The Class Clown album was done totally sober. I'd realized what a hell I'd made for myself and I cleaned up completely for three months. You can hear the clarity of my thinking and of my speech on that album.

Thinking, Class, Months

Source: reprints.longform.org

When I listen to those tapes now, the real cocaine shows; there's just nothing special about their content.

Real, Special, Tape

Source: reprints.longform.org

I was never a pipe or bong man. That's California stuff. I was an Eastern roller.

Men, California, Stuff

Source: reprints.longform.org

I'd say pot has been a break-even proposition for me.

Break Even, Pot, Propositions

Source: reprints.longform.org

For an entertainer, part of the thing you do is just style. And the coke did help me get into great runs of pure form.

Running, Style, Coke

Source: reprints.longform.org

Two things happened. The creative side of my career was harmed. When I'd sit down and write under the influence of coke, the ratio of pages kept to pages thrown out declined drastically. But onstage, when rapping about a feeling I already owned, I would sometimes get a burst of eloquence.

Rap, Writing, Careers

Source: reprints.longform.org

There are an awful lot of things in the cut of street drugs that eventually make you sick. I reached a point where the skin around the edges of my fingernails used to hurt all the time. And it would peel away easily. Now, that must have been from some poison in the cut.

Hurt, Cutting, Sick

Source: reprints.longform.org

Suddenly, I was thirty, very unhappy entertaining people in their forties, and here came a group of people in their teens and twenties who had similar anti-authority problems and similar dreams and wishes, hopes for mankind. So I gravitated toward them.

Dream, People, Wish

The ritual was very important to me: cleaning the pot, rolling the pot.

Important, Rolling, Cleaning

Source: reprints.longform.org

Because Brenda [Carlin] had a drinking problem along with the coke, she had to hit bottom first. Most alcoholics do. And for her, bottom was an automobile accident that almost landed her in jail.

Drinking, Jail, Coke

Source: reprints.longform.org

Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game. Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.

Baseball, Football, Struggle

George Carlin (2007). “The Best of Brain Droppings”, p.38, Peter Pauper Press, Inc.

I always have these little internal monologues. You'll get used to them.

Littles, Used, Monologues

Source: reprints.longform.org

The women who line up at a comic's dressing-room door are not what you'd call your class groupies.

Doors, Class, Lines

Source: reprints.longform.org

Everything that you know about yourself comes from thinking back, and I think I saw religion as the first big betrayal of me.

Betrayal, Thinking, Saws

Broadway isn't a very big career move. There's no money in it and it doesn't mean anything to your career. It's just a nice little jewel in the crown.

Nice, Moving, Mean

Source: www.cnn.com

I set out to become a comedian, and I said in order to do that the first thing I'll do is become a disc jockey and know my pop music. I like it, my voice is good, and I can start out getting confidence without an audience in front of me.

Order, Voice, Comedian

I simply decided that dope wasn't worth the ritual.

Dope, Ritual, Decided

Source: reprints.longform.org

Barry Goldwater has definitely decided to be a candidate in '64. He will campaign in all thirteen states.

Campaigns, States, Thirteen

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