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Dave Barry Quotes about Writing

All Dave Barry Quotes Age Arguing Art Atheist Beer Boat Business Character Childhood Children Christmas Cleaning Coffee College Commitment Country Dad Darkness Doubt Drinking Driving Effort Fashion Feelings Fighting Flying Food Football Fun Funny Giving God Golf Halloween Hate Hilarious Holiday Home House Humanity Inspirational Internet Journalism Justice Killing Kissing Literature Memories Mountain Music Office Pain Past Politics Pregnancy Purpose Rain Reading Religion Respect Responsibility Risk Running Sailing Sarcasm School Science Sleep Son Sports Students Stupidity Taxes Team Technology Today Training Travel Vacation Waiting War Water Weed Weight Loss Wife Winter Writing quotes

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

God, Writing, Stupidity

Panicky despair is an underrated element of writing.

Writing, Despair, Elements

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Running, Religious, Writing

Dave Barry (2010). “Dave Barry's Greatest Hits”, p.201, Ballantine Books

Every year I write a tax advice column and I used to always make fun of that. One year, one of my favorite IRS commissioners, I think his name was Roscoe somebody, wrote that one of the most often-asked questions by taxpayers was, "How can I contribute more?" Well, I tell ya, ol' Roscoe's really been doing situps under parked cars again. I've heard a lot of people ask a lot of questions about taxes, but I never heard anybody say, "How can I, the ordinary person, send more money for no reason?"

Fun, Writing, Thinking

"All I Think Is That It's Stupid". Interview with Glenn Garvin, reason.com. December, 1994.

I love the resource of the Internet. I use it all the time. Anything I'm writing - for example, if I'm writing a scene about Washington D.C. and I want to know where this monument is, I can find it right away, I can get a picture of the monument, it just makes your life so much easier, especially if you're writing fiction. You can check stuff so much quicker, and I think that's all great for writers.

Writing, Thinking, Fiction

Source: www.writersdigest.com

Don't you wish you had a job like mine? All you have to do is think up a certain number of words! Plus, you can repeat words! And they don't even have to be true!

Jobs, Writing, Thinking

Editorials are written by people who have agreed to have several strong opinions a day and to write them down, provided they do not have to sign their names.

Strong, Writing, Media

Many things have been written, including by me, linking humor and pain. Mostly, in my case, the humor part keeps me sane. If I spent all my hours writing things like "Fatal Distraction," I'd become a brooding, erratic melancholic. I'd be Raskolnikov.

Pain, Writing, Erratic

Thanks to my solid academic training, today I can write hundreds of words on virtually any topic without possessing a shred of information which is how I got a good job in journalism.

Funny, Jobs, Writing

Dave Barry (2009). “Dave Barry Is from Mars and Venus”, p.48, Ballantine Books

I really need to know where I'm going with fiction to write it in a way that at least I'm happy with. And I really think that a lot of fiction books end badly because terrific writers said, "I'll just figure it out" and plunge in, but have created so many problems that they are kind of impossible to solve. I mean, I'm talking really good writers do this and you can tell when they got to the end they either had to do something preposterous or they just don't really resolve things. So for fiction I spend a lot more time outlining and for humor I really don't do much of it.

Book, Writing, Mean

Source: www.writersdigest.com

The more boring a newspaper is, the more it is respected. The most respected newspaper in the United States is The New York Times, which has thousands of reporters constantly producing enormous front-page stories about bauxite...The [New York] Post would write about bauxite only if famous celebrites were arrested for snorting it in an exclusive Manhattan nightclub.

New York, Writing, Media

Your job is to give people a reason to keep reading.

Jobs, Reading, Writing

I've come to realize that you're going to get criticized no matter what. Somebody will always hate what you write, especially if you write humor for a fairly broad audience. Somebody will always find it not funny and declare you're not funny anymore. And sometimes people are just crazy.

Hate, Crazy, Writing

Source: www.writersdigest.com

With humor you have so many options with topics and length, I mean I can write humor essays in books now and they can be as long as I want them to be.

Book, Writing, Mean

Source: www.writersdigest.com

When I write my annual tax column, some ex-IRS agent will complain, "There you go IRS bashing again." They're always saying that they're just doing their job. Someone I know once said, "You could get another job."

Jobs, Writing, Irs

""All I Think Is That It's Stupid": An Interview with Dave Barry". Interview with Glenn Garvin, reason.com. December, 1994.

I don't like anything unsigned in a newspaper that purports to be the opinion of some group if we don't know who the group is. It's laughable to say that The Miami Herald's editorials or any newspaper's editorials represent any views other than those of the people writing them, so why don't we tell everybody who they are?

Writing, Views, People

""All I Think Is That It's Stupid": An Interview with Dave Barry". Interview with Glenn Garvin, reason.com. December, 1994.

When preparing your return, you should be sure to avoid common mistakes. The two most common taxpayer mistakes, states the IRS booklet, are (1) "failure to include a current address," and (2) "failure to be a large industry that gives humongous contributions to key tax-law-writing congresspersons."

Mistake, Writing, Law

Dave Barry (1994). “The World According to Dave Barry”, Outlet

I report as a machine; I write as a person. That clear dichotomy softens the transition.

Writing, Transition, Machines

"Secrets of a Two-Time Pulitzer Winner". Interview with Michael Mechanic, www.motherjones.com. June 30, 2010.

People don't think of writers as sex objects. The women who write to me and suggest that we ought to have sex usually turn out to be, like, eighty. And their letters always end with, "Just joking."

Sex, Writing, Thinking

"Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

The one thing I'm terrified of trying to write about is sex. I mean my God, my wife might read it or my daughter might read it or my son might read it, so no, I've never really written about eroticism at all.

Daughter, Sex, Writing

Source: www.writersdigest.com

There are terrific TV shows now. This is a golden age for TV humor, I think. There's an actual market there. Of course, I have no idea how you'd break in, but there must be a way. They have all these shows and they need jokes and somebody is writing them.

Writing, Thinking, Tv Shows

Source: www.writersdigest.com

I am much more likely to care about someone trying to be funny and give them some credit for whatever he or she did that was remotely funny than I am to be mused by somebody declaring this isn't funny, that isn't funny, this sucks. If you want to write humor, you're going to have to get used to that.

Writing, Giving, Trying

Source: www.writersdigest.com

The older I get and the more fiction I write, the more I outline, the more I think about plot before I dive in and plunge too far.

Writing, Thinking, Plot

Source: www.writersdigest.com

Always remember that if editors were so damned smart, they would know how to dress.

Smart, Writing, Editors

It's very slow for me to create humor. It takes me a long time to write a humor piece. It takes days.

Writing, Long, Pieces

Source: www.writersdigest.com

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