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Woody Allen Quotes - Page 9

All Quotes Age Anxiety Art Atheism Atheist Baseball Basketball Beer Boredom Character Childhood Children Choices College Comedy Concentration Cooking Country Crime Culture Cynicism Death Desire Divorce Drama Driving Dying Education Enthusiasm Failing Falling In Love Feelings Fighting Film Food Fun Funny Genius Getting Older Giving God Hate Heart Heaven Hell Hilarious Home House Human Nature Humanity Hurt Imagination Immortality Inspiration Inspirational Inspiring Kissing Laughter Liberty Life Logic Love Love And Death Love Life Luck Lying Mankind Marriage Maturity Meaning Of Life Money Morning Pain Past Philosophy Politics Quality Reading Reality Regret Reincarnation Religion Running Sarcasm School Science Sleep Smoking Stupidity Style Success Suffering Sunday Talent Time Today Tragedy Universe Waiting Wall War Water Wife Winning Writing

I heard that Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysenery.

I heard that Commentary and Dissent had merged and formed Dysenery.

Annie Hall, Magazines, Heard

Woody Allen, Marshall Brickman (2000). “Annie Hall: scénario bilingue”

Is Knowledge knowable? If not, how do we know?

Knows, Ifs

Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.

Love, Funny, Sexy

Love and Death (motion picture) (1975)

Over the years I've never written or made movies about political themes 'cause while they do have current critical importance, in the large, large scheme of things, only the big questions matter and the answers to those big questions are very, very depressing.

Depressing, Years, Political

Can you believe that? She says I'm not leader enough for her. Who was she looking for... Hitler?

Believe, Leader, Enough

"Bananas". www.imdb.com. 1971.

If the world is a progressively realized community of interpretation, then either quadruplictity will drink procrastination or, provided that the nothing negates, boredom will ensue seldom more often than frequently.

Procrastination, Boredom, Community

I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier.

Witty, Humorous, Paris

"Fictional character: Joe". "Everyone Says I Love You", 1996.

I have bad reflexes. I was once run over by a car being pushed by two guys.

Funny, Running, Humor

I don't think my parents liked me. They put a live teddy bear in my crib.

Funny, Humor, Parenting

The prison psychiatrist asked me if I thought sex was dirty. I told him only when it's done right.

Sex, Dirty, Done

Life is hard for insects. And don't think mice are having any fun either.

Life, Fun, Science

Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

Who bothers to cook TV dinners? I suck them frozen.

Frozen, Dinner, Tvs

Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.

Enjoy It While It Lasts, Answers, Should

"Fictional character: Mickey". "Hannah and Her Sisters", 1986.

Spencer was searching for a woman interested in gold, inorganic chemistry, outdoor sex and the music of Bach. In short, he was looking for himself, only female.

Sex, Gold, Female

If God is everywhere, I had concluded, then He is in food. Therefore, the more I ate the godlier I would become. Impelled by this new religious fervor, I glutted myself like a fanatic.

Funny, God, Religious

Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

Sun is bad for you. Everything our parents said was good is bad. Sun, milk, red meat...college.

Cute, Witty, Humorous

Annie Hall, www.imdb.com. 1977.

I'm giving [my analyst] one more year--then I'm going to Lourdes.

Years, Giving, Analysts

Love is too weak a word for what I feel - I luuurve you, you know, I loave you, I luff you, two F's, yes.

Romantic, Love Is, Two

Annie Hall, www.imdb.com. 1977.

Standard mathematics has recently been rendered obsolete by the discovery that for years we have been writing the numeral five backward. This has led to reevaluation of counting as a method of getting from one to ten. Students are taught advanced concepts of Boolean algebra, and formerly unsolvable equations are dealt with by threats of reprisals.

Education, Writing, Science

Woody Allen (2007). “The Insanity Defense: The Complete Prose”, Random House Incorporated

How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?

Funny, God, Witty

I've never felt Truth was Beauty. Never. I've always felt that people can't take too much reality. I like being in Ingmar Bergman's world. Or in Louis Armstrong's world. Or in the world of the New York Knicks. Because it's not this world. You spend your whole life searching for a way out. You just get an overdose of reality, you know, and it's a terrible thing. I'm always fighting against reality.

New York, Fighting, Reality

Honey, you're the one who stopped sleeping with me, OK? It'll be a year come April 20th. I remember the date exactly, because it was Hitler's birthday

Sleep, Years, Honey

"Fictional character: Clifford Stern". "Crimes and Misdemeanors", www.imdb.com. 1989.

I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.

Death, Suicide, Dying

He was so depressed, he tried to commit suicide by inhaling next to an Armenian.

Funny, Suicide, Humor

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.

Love, Sex, Liberty

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